Being Next to You - Always there

rina - gap

     Julian was already acting funny.
     "Is it because— of that day?"
     Why did he say that?
     "What makes you say that?" I asked. A silent gap, "Were you bothered— about what happened?"
      I couldn't look at his properly face.
     He knew, so he kept himself busy. The sound of droplets coming out from faucet and the clinking of the plates were piercing.
     "I don't really know, to be honest, but the fact you were acting strangely bothers me. Though, I understand the reason why..," he answered, placing the cooking implements one by one to their proper places.
     "I'm sorry," I apologized.
     "Why're you apologizing?" Julian responded.
     I feel nervous again. I don't feel fluffiness inside my heart, but it's definitely racing...
     "So.., do you still want to go?" He asked, changing the subject.
     I answered, "Yes!"
     I was very eager. Julian was startled, I blushed automatically. I hid my face.
     "What's wrong?" He asked again.
     "Nothing." It was my only answer. Julian did not push it, he just stayed quiet, cleaning. And I was doing nothing but sitting. I kept on debating in my head if I'm going to help him or not— I'm too fickle minded.
     "Do you want to go outside? I'm already done with the cleaning," he said.
     "Umm... Sorry for not helping you clean," I apologized again.
     "Don't sweat it. Besides, it'll make your dress dirty," he stretched out his hand. I thought Julian was going to pat my head. But in the middle of it, he flinched, he removed it away.
     "Let's go," he said, opening the door.
     "Okay..." This feeling might be wrong, but, I was kinda expecting something.
     Walking. Was it always this quiet between us?
     "Umm.. Where are we going?" I tried starting a proper conversation.
      Julian looked at me. "I don't know," he answered.
     "I see... You don't know... You don't know?"
     "What answer were you expecting?" He began to ask.
     "Umm. To... your brother maybe?" My answer sounded unsure.
     "Jude, huh?" He was making his thinking habit again. "Well, I'm a bit curious about what his class' going to do?"
     He changed direction. I followed him. Julian too, was matching his speed of walking to mine. However, I can't seem to catch up. I kept stepping on the end of the skirt— Erie might get angry with me. What to do???
     "Are you having a hard time with your dress?" Julian concerned, he seems to notice.
    "What?" I dumbfounded.
    "Don't give me "what"? You were stumbling in your dress. Don't you want to change? We can stop in your room if you want."
     He really noticed it.
     "N-No, I'm fine," I stuttered. "It's more the reason to keep wearing it. What if I trip on stage in show time? That would be an embarrassment!" I reasoned out loud.
     Why did I raise my voice??
     He showed a mirth. Time appears to stop. "That would be embarrassing indeed," he agreed. He smiled? Why were you showing that face to me?? It was so unfair because I think it's cute, and I'm falling for you more. That was a very bad move...
     "Are you coming?" His brown eyes were still smiling. Really, it was a foul play.
     I feel that my face was burning up, as red as an apple. I wonder what face I was making? "Ugly" might be the perfect word for it.
     We're in other building already. And it seems to be we have arrived at our destination. Julian entered a room, asking a student inside— I was waiting outside like a typical Irina Bookman would do. My heartbeat was acting strangely. Well— it's not. But I can't obliviously show it to him. I know that my emotions show easily.
     "It seems like my brother went out for a bit." Julian came out of the classroom.
     I was surprised. "I-I see," I said that weirdly. How come?? "Are we gon'na to wait for him?" I uttered.
     "If you want," he said.
     "What do you want?"
     We're exchanging questions again.
     "Don't wait for him," he answered, simply as that, leaning against the wall with me. "I'm not particularly looking for Jude. And I want to spend my extra time looking around instead."
     I didn't expect that he'll give me that answer.
     "Oh," I expressed— not that loud. I tried changing the subject, "What's your brother's class doing?"
     "Well, their sign says "Butler Cafe," so, I think butlers are going to serve tables."
     "That sounds very English!" I did a British accent. "I wonder if they're going to serve tea in teacups!" My voice sounds very excited. I remembered a book I read about a butler and his young master. His description is very handsome and mysterious, yet I love reading his well-bred lines. His voice sounds so dreamy when I imagine it.
     "Ah, I remembered. There's something I wanted to talk about," Julian caught my curiosity.
     "What is it?" I asked— I woke up from my daydreaming.
     "About the la—"
     "YOU'RE SO DEAD WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!"
     We heard anger, it was hollering across the corridors. Sadly, someone out there, and razed our atmosphere.
     "I wonder who's that?" It took Julian's attention, he heard it too.
     "JUDE! IF YOU BREAK MY GLASSES, I SWEAR I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!!!"
     "Great. I accept your challenge!"
     There was that voice again, and another. I just got distracted a bit, but Julian's expression was showing grimace a lot. And it was an eye-opener.
     I heard him muttering:
     "Please, you're not him..."
     He was like praying to the Heavens that he's intuition was wrong.
     However, two waiters were dashing. Jude was running towards our direction. He stopped as soon as he noticed his older twin— he was holding a pair of glasses in his hand.
     "What are you doing, Jude?" He saw them and then asked. There was something causing him to feel agitated.
     "Oh, Julian," his younger brother reacted.
    "GOT YOU."
    Rage. A flying menu swung by. And presto, it slammed at Julian's face. His face turned red from the pain— he looks very displeased.
     "Are you okay?" I was looking for my tissue, (why tissues???). Julian was holding his face where I imagined it stings.
     He was making no sound, then, I heard him groaned.
     Yikes. I panicked. "Are you okay?" I repeated, however, I was afraid I asked the wrong question...
     "Not— much," he replied.
     "Uhmmm. Sorry, Julian... That was— an accident..," the waiter came to apologize.
     "Got it," he answered.
     Was that an OK answer??? We both don't know.
     "You missed, Kevin," Jude commented, unnecessarily to his friend who threw the menu.
     "This is your fault, stupid," Kevin blamed him.
     I was staring at their bickering, and he seemed to notice.
     "Sorry, you had to see that," Kevin started to apologize to me.
     I flinched. I shook my head. "Don't worry about me. I'm more worried about Julian."
     "He's okay. My big bro is a strong boy, you know," said Jude.
     "You bastard... How can you say that to your twin?" Kevin reacted.
     "It's because he is my twin," he answered.
     Flick. "You're not me, Jude." Julian flicked his brother's forehead— he was playing payback I think...
     "How many times do I have to tell you tha—? Ow... My eyes..." He scratched his irises, it became a bit watery.
     "You, okay?" Jude concerned.
     "Yeah, but return Kev's glasses back to him. Y'know he can't see well without them," said Julian.
     "He's wearing eye-contacts right now. He looks better without them anyway, right?" responded Jude.
     "I'm not asking," he answered.
     I can't make a reaction.
     "Sorry," said Jude to his brother.
     "This is the wrong direction, you know," Julian replied.
     Jude turned around and apologized to Kevin while returning his glasses.
    "My bad, Kev."
    "Uhh... Sure...." A poker face, yes. Wiping his glasses with his apron. "Yeesh... Does Julian really that scares you?" He questioned Jude in a whisper.
    "He doesn't scare me. He freaks me out," Jude corrected.
     He called out.
     "Hey, giant."
     My finger moved on its own— it was pointing to myself.
     "Me???"
     "Who else is taller as me?" He gave me a sarcastic tone.
     It hit a nerve. And for your information, he and Julian are still taller than me. How rude.
     "That was unnecessary. Thank you," I answered back.
     It makes my cheeks exceedingly red. Then I saw something drop on the floor. It was a few droplets of red.
     Julian's hand changed into red.