American Love Affair (5 Seconds of Summer fan fiction)

Chapter 15

(Content Warning: Sexual assault)                                                        

He was big.  6' 5" and toned.  He would have been perfect on any varsity football or basketball roster, but he didn't "believe" in sports.  He was different.  Didn't fit into the rigid conventions of high school hallways.  He cared about a lot.  The environment.  Animal rights–he was vegan.  Human rights.  And maybe that's why I was into him.  He believed that everyone and everything was worth saving.  

The only thing he didn't seem to care about was his body.  I was only a sophomore, but it was widely known that he had a few bad habits.  Smoking and drinking.  I still remember the lingering smell of cigarettes on his clothes.  

When he asked me out, I said yes.  He was a year older, and neither me, nor my friends, really understood what he saw in me.  They were jealous, and I think I just liked feeling seen by someone.  We spent a lot of time at his house, his parents never seemed to be home.  My mom would have killed me if she knew I wasn't in the library; I was sitting on the couch with a senior guy sipping beers.  At school, he wasn't embarrassed by me.  He would kiss me in the hallways and hold my hand on the way to class.  Even when I texted him at two in the morning when I needed to talk, he was always there.  How could someone so sweet and nice end up being so...bad for me?   

"Yeah, Mom.  It's just a little get-together.  No, there won't be drinking."  I lied, knowing there would be enough alcohol to open a real bar.  "Yes, my friend is picking me up.  They're here now."

"Okay.  Fine.  But keep your phone on you."  My mom bit her lip, reluctant to let me go high school party. 

When we arrived I was struck by the noise.  It was loud.  I could hear the music pounding even from outside.  In the house, my ears throbbed from the noise.  I drifted through the party for the whole night.  Inside, then outside.  Dancing, then talking.  I didn't recognize most of the people, so I I tried to stick with my friend and Jai.  Sitting in his lap on the couch, he shared his drink with me. But one point, he wandered off, leaving me on the couch among strangers, and I knew I would find him drinking.  

I found him in the kitchen, doing shots with his friends, and he invited me to join him.  He slurred his words when he spoke to me.  I declined, and he tugged me upstairs instead.  When he tried to kiss me his breath tasted like alcohol.  He stumbled over himself as we walked down the hall.  

He fumbled with the doorknob to a bedroom and pushed me against the wall.  His hot breath against my ear made me want to shrink.  

"Jai.  Stop," I said and pushed my hand against his chest.  

This didn't feel right. 

But he was strong.  He let his hand roam over my body, and I forced my eyes shut.  This was just a bad dream.  Only a bad dream.  I counted to three.  But when I opened my eyes, he was still there.  He grabbed at my chest, sloppily kissing down my neck, and I winced. 

"Stop!  Jai, you're hurting me."  I tried to sound forceful, but he continued kneading my chest like dough. 

His hand moved lower, past my stomach, and he started rubbing there too.  I forced my eyes shut. 

"Don't touch me!"  I tried to squirm past him, but he had me forced against the wall.

I tried to reach my phone from my pocket, but he gripped my hand.

"Let go," I hissed.

He took my hand and placed it against him, rubbing my hand up and down.  I felt his bulge getting harder through his jeans.  Hot tears streamed down my face.  I felt like i was choking on my own breath.  

"Shut up, slut."  He spoke slowly, processing his own words.  "I know you like this.  I can feel you getting wet through your jeans."  

Heavy tears dropped from my eyelashes.  Jai dragged me over to the bed and started fiddling with my shorts, trying to get the zipper and button undone.  I pounded against his chest, begging him to stop.  He finally succeeded with my shorts and slipped everything down to my ankles.  I couldn't breathe.  He ripped his shirt off and forced his tongue down my throat.

"You're going to like this, baby.  I promise."  

He forced his hand over my mouth, so I wouldn't scream when he...

"What the fuck dude?  Get off of her!"  I could hear a voice but my eyes were too blinded by tears.  

I sucked in a breath and tried not hyperventilate.  The guy forced Jai off of me, and Jai stumbled out of the room.  I never wanted to see him again.  The boy wiped the tears from eyes, but was careful not to touch me anywhere else. 

"Did he..."

I shook my head, not able to speak. 

He walked over to a drawer and handed me a shirt, so I could cover myself up.  He turned around while I put it on.

"Is this your house?"  I asked, not sure if my voice could be heard by anyone but myself.  

He nodded, "...Can I call someone for you?"

I swallowed the enormous lump that had grown in my throat. 

"My mom," I handed him my unlocked phone and he searched through my contact list. 

"She's on her way.  Twenty minutes."

"You don't have to stay with me."  I said.  "I'll be okay."

"I want to make sure you're okay." 

He let me lean my head against his should and started stroking my back.  I wiped my eyes and snorted in the mucus, closing my eyes.  My mom came for me, and the boy walked me to the car.  I felt his arm around me the entire time, keeping me up really, and he helped me into the car.  I was glad to be tired because I fell asleep around the same time my mom started crying.  It was the first time she had done so in my presence in a very long time.