Chim - Make You Stay

Chapter 7

Cheryl

I keep reading the last text she sent over and over.

'I'm fine. See you soon hopefully.xx'

She said she'll see me soon, but it's been three whole days since she last text me, and I really miss her.

I know I'm getting too hung up over nothing, but I can't help it. I sigh, putting my head in my hands, just wanting to stop feeling crazy and confused all of the time.

I go into the kitchen and find a bottle of alcohol, just wanting to silence the ongoing conflict in my head. As I take a swig, I call up my counsellor and cancel tonight's session, coughing falsely and saying I feel ill.

I light up a cigarette and take long drags, just sitting and thinking. Then I decide, I really should write some stuff down in my diary. It always helps me calm down.

I swig on my drink as I wander around, looking for a pen, and I go back to the sofa when I find one. I pull the notebook from under the pillow, but it's already open. Someone has been reading it.

Anger floods through me. This is my private notebook and nobody has the right to read it, and there's only one person that it could have been.

Kim.

****

Kimberley

I walk through the door, exhausted from a long day at work. Some of the customers were so rude to me today, and I really want to relax.

But as soon as I sit on the sofa, my phone starts to ring. I go to reject the call but I see it's Cheryl and my heart skips a beat. I've been waiting for a text from her for about three days now and I'm excited to hear from her.

"Heya Babe, how are you?" I smile.

"Don't you play dumb with us Kimberley, I know what you did! How dare you?! How could you?!"

I am taken aback by her shouting, what on earth has happened?

"Cheryl? What are you talking about?"

"Me fu!king diary! You read it I know you did!"

My heart drops as I realise what she is talking about.

"Sh!t, I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to.."

"DON'T SAY SORRY"

I'm scared. I've never heard her yelling like this before. In the silence, I hear her taking big gulps of something and I realise that she is drinking again.

"Are you getting drunk again? For fu!ks sake Cheryl!"

"YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO ANY MORE"

The line goes dead. I know there is no point calling her back, she has to calm down. I force myself to take deep breaths, fuming at her still. I'm so mixed up, I'm angry at her but at the same time I want to call her back and beg her to forgive me, or to go to her house and stop her drinking.

I massage my temples and decide to go and take a nap. Sitting around and stressing isn't going to make the situation any better.

I go in to the bedroom and crawl under the duvet, feeling rotten. I close my eyes and feel my worries begin to melt away as I slowly drift off to sleep.

My eyes shoot open and I sit bolt upright. I hear my phone ringing loudly in the living room and realise that my nap lasted longer than intended. I look at the clock and see it's 10pm already.

I crawl out of bed, going to my phone and looking at the caller ID.

Cheryl calling

I sigh and answer the call.

"Is this Kimberley?"

The voice is male and American, and I don't recognise it. My heart begins to beat faster.

"Yes, who's speaking?"

"My name is Dean, I work at the hospital. Cheryl's been asking me to phone you.."

He carries on talking but I don't hear a word of what he's saying. I feel like my heart is going to explode or I'm going to be sick and I have to remind myself how to breathe. This must be a dream. Please tell me this is a dream.

"..Kimberley are you there?"

"Sorry.. could you repeat that?"

"We got a call from a passer by and they'd found Cheryl. She'd passed out on the sidewalk so we took her to hospital and in the ambulance she kept asking for you. Do you want to come down?"

Before I can even say yes I've ended the call and called for a taxi. I grab my jacket and bag, hurrying out the door and waiting impatiently for the car to arrive, with thoughts of Cheryl buzzing around my head like angry wasps.

I need her to be okay.

As soon as the taxi pulls to a stop I leap out, practically throwing my money at the driver. I rush into the reception area, becoming out of breath quickly.

"Cheryl Tweedy" I say to the woman at reception, and she stares at me, confused.

"Visiting hours have ended.."

Just as I go to scream at her, a tall, blonde man comes running over to me.

"Kimberley?"

"Yes that's me"

"This way" He says, hurrying down a sequence if corridors whilst I try to keep up with him.

He stops abruptly outside a set of double doors and turns to face me.

"She's still probably drunk.. and she's also anaemic and malnourished. She hasn't eaten properly in weeks"

The way he looks at me, I can tell he holds me responsible. But he's right, this is my fault. I have to make it right.

I push past him and go into the room, and I feel like I'm going to be sick.

Cheryl is laying in a bed with an IV drip and she looks so small, like the pillows are going to swallow her up. She's so pale and it's only now that I truly notice how thin she is, like she would snap if you dropped her.

I go and sit down on a chair next to her bed and remember our argument from earlier. I'm so ashamed, I knew she was getting drunk, I could have stopped this from happening.

I rest my head on the bed and hold onto her hand tightly, promising myself that I won't let go.