DISCONTINUED If Only Memories Could Be Erased(A Shoto Todoroki X Oc Fanfic)

Ch3: House Life

Tamaki's pov

I unlocked the door and entered the house. All the lights were off so I guessed that dad was still at work. I sighed and walked into my room, ignoring one of our kittens that tried to play with me. I walked up to my room and shut the door behind me, dropping my stuff on the floor. This is where I spent most of my time at home nowadays. I rarely ever went into the other rooms unless absolutely necessary. I walked into the bathroom and looked into the mirror, trying to find any sign of the person I used to be like I did everyday. Nothing. I looked down at my hands which gripped onto the sink. They were just as pale as always. I took off my uniform jacket and rolled up my shirt sleeve. The scars I had made at school were bleeding again. I washed the blood off. I didn't want dad to see. He would worry to much and I didn't think he should waste his time worrying about me. I walked back into my room and sat at my desk, trying to do homework. I couldn't concentrate on it though. I tried but couldn't. After a few hours of answering about 3 questions, I heard footsteps ascending the stairs. My door opened.
"You hungry?" dad asked.
"No. I'm fine" I replied, not facing him. I could hear him rummaging through my bag and knew he was getting my lunch box.
"You barely touched your lunch" he pointed out.
"I wasn't that hungry then either" I replied.
"You need to eat. Come downstairs and I'll make you something or if you don't want to come downstairs then I can bring your food up here" he told me.
"I said I'm fine!" I snapped, slamming my fist down on the table. I regretted that.
"Alright. If you say so" he sighed and left the room. I ran my fingers through my hair and leaned my head on the desk. I didn't want to snap at him but I just couldn't stop myself. I got up from my chair and grabbed the box I used to hide my blades. I went into the bathroom and locked the door, sitting against one wall and sliding down to the floor and pulled my knees up to my chest. I cried into my knees, thankful that the fan in the bathroom was noisy enough to hide my crying. I wiped my face with my arm and stayed still for a second. I grabbed the box and took out one of the blades. I rolled up my sleeves and placed the blade against my skin. I held it there for a second before dragging it along my arm, the scarlet blood bubbling to the surface. If dad found out then he'd probably send me to therapy and take away my blades. I couldn't let him do that. The blades helped. They were my comfort. I used them if anything ever went wrong in my life, which was often. If I was beaten up, use the blade. Insulted, use the blade. Pushed away any of the people who still care about me, use the blade. My life was a mess. I was broken. Nothing more than an empty husk. The remains of who I used to be had dwindled down to mere sparks a long time ago and those sparks had died out a long time ago too. I was a mistake. I haven't contributed to anything in my life. I didn't know why I was here. Once I had finished and wiped the blood off my arms, I left the bathroom. I looked down the stairs and saw Dad talking with Hizashi. I turned away and went back to my room. Dad Hadd friends to help him. I didn't. I've tried making friends but I get irritated so fast that no one wants to be around me. I always pushed everyone away from me in my life. I used to be so close to dad and then I pushed him away. He used to always find the time to talk to me even when he had papers to grade but now he only talks to me for less then 10 minutes at a time, usually at breakfast, during lunch and when he comes home from the school. I sighed and changed into my pyjamas. While I changed, I noticed some of my ribs were showing again. I sighed. I finished changing and just laid down on my bed. Not like I was going to fall asleep. I always had trouble with that. Instead I just lay awake, staring at the ceiling.