DISCONTINUED If Only Memories Could Be Erased(A Shoto Todoroki X Oc Fanfic)

Ch17: Comfort

A/n: Before I begin, I would like to let you know that this chapter was written in advance. This is the first time I've done this. My reason is that I'm away today on a Dofe expedition and need to write in advance. So sorry if its rushed.

Also TRIGGER WARNING

Tamaki's pov

I lay in my bed, scowling through my phone. I was flicking through some social media, my earphones in to try and drown out the dark thoughts in the back of my mind that crept up on me, especially at night when I was alone. I skimmed over stuff, not too bothered about it until my eyes rested on a post. I read over it and any noise around me drowned out. My eyes flicked over the post several times. It was a post hating on people who had mental disorders. Or specifically, those who had depression and of course it mentioned self harm. Those dark thoughts just returned, drowning out the sound of the music.
'Your useless. Your nothing but an attention seeker. You don't deserve to live' we're just some of the thoughts running through my head. I got up and walked into the bathroom, having removed my earphones and left them in my room. I looked at myself in the mirror, only seeing something that I hated. Myself. I gripped onto the sink, my breathing becoming ragged. My eyes trailed to the razor that dad rarely ever used. I tried to stop myself from taking it, using all of the self control that I had but it wasn't enough. I grabbed the razer and slid it along my wrist, drawing fat scarlet drops. It wasn't enough, I made another cut and then another until my entire arm was coated in blood. It still wasn't enough. I started cutting my other arm, one after the other until my other arm was also coated in blood. I was breathing heavily, my mind foggy as I tried to wrap it around what was going on. Then I remembered what I had tolls Shoto and my throat went dry. I fell to my knees, wrapping my arms around myself, tears building up in my eyes. I had broken our promise. I pulled my phone out of the pocket in my pjs and looked at it. I unlocked it and scowled down to Shoto's contact. My finger hovered over it for a few seconds before pressing it as I put it to my ear, listening to the rings.
'He's probably not going to answer. I'm not important enough for him to wake up so early' I thought. Suddenly the ringing was cut off and I heard the sound of movement on the other end.
"Tamaki?" he asked. I tried to form words but all that came out was heavy breathing for a couple minutes.
"I'm..... sorry" I whispered, finally being able to say something although my voice was cracking and some of the tears were now falling from my eyes, landing on my arms which sting.
"Sssh. Stay calm and tell me what's wrong" he soothed.
"I'm...... Sorry..... I shouldn't have woken you" I apologised, feeling like I should have kept my problems to myself. He didn't need to deal with them. It was my problem.
"No its alright. Tell me what's wrong?" he told me.
"I......... I broke our promise" I cried, wiping my arm across my face which just smeered blood on it. I started to hear the sound of rapid movement.
"Tamaki. Stay calm. Where's Mr Aizawa?" he asked, sounding like he was trying to stay cakm.
"I think he's staying over with friends. He was out with them so I think he's staying with them" I told him.
"And Shinso?" he added.
"Staying over at a friend's as well" I answered.
"Alright. Stay calm. I'm on my way. Do you want me to stay on the phone with you?" he asked.
"You don't have to come over" I whispered, not wanting him to get in trouble because of me.
"No. I'm coming. Now do you want me to stay on the phone or no?" he asked me gently.
"Yes please"

Shoto's pov

I reached Tamaki's House as I tried the door to see if she had unlocked it for me. Still locked.
"Tamaki. I'm at the door. Could you open it for me?" I asked. She stayed silent for a minute before I heard the sound of her moving. After a couple of minutes, the door slowly opened although I didn't see Tamaki. I walked inside. All the lights were out, filling the room with a darkness that created quite a sad mood. I turned around and saw Tamaki closing the door. The first thing I noticed was the blood that caked her arms, leaving nothing untouched.
"Let's get you cleaned up" I told her, walking over to the stairs. She followed me silently. I went into the bathroom which was pretty messy. Tamaki's phone had been left on the floor as well as a rasor. Blood also stained red patches onto the floor. I decided to keep the light off as I ran a bath for Tamaki. She needed something to help her relax. I looked over at the door. Tamaki stood there, facing the floor. I walked over to her. I placed my finger under her chin and lifted her head to look at me. I found a large smudge of blood over her face and her eyes turning red from tears.
"

It's OK. I'll help you" I encouraged her.
"I........ I broke our promise" she whispered, tears becoming larger as they threatened to fall.
"Ssh. Its alright. I know that this kind of stuff is hard to get over. I'm not mad and I'm not disappointed. I just want to make sure that you don't get hurt more because these injuries are left untreated" I told her. She sniffled before wiping her arm over face again. I checked the water level and turned it off since it was at the right height. I searched through the cupboard and found a hair bobble, using it to tie Tamaki's hair back although a couple strands came loose and fell into her face.
"Can you take your clothes off?" I asked. She looked away slightly.
"Do I have to?" she asked.
"I'm afraid so. We need to get you cleaned up and there is blood all over your arms and face so a bath is the best option" I explained.
"But you'll be disgusted" she objected, looking away.
"No I won't. I promise" I told her. She hesitated for a second before slowly removing her top.
"You can keep your underwear on if you don't want to completly strip but the top and trouser do have to come off" I explained. She nodded, dropping her top on the floor. Now I knew why she thought I'd be disgusted. She was so skinny. I could make out every rib clearly. She removed her trousers before wrapping her arms around herself.
"Come on. Let's get you washed up" I told her. She got in the bath. She hissed in pain when the hot water touched the cuts on her arms. I grabbed a cloth and started to gently wash off all the blood. Then I washed the smudged blood on her face. Once that was done, I let her get out as I gave her a towel which she wrapped herself in. I picked up her phone and grabbed a first aid kit as I walked to her room. I let her get changed before having her sit down on the bed. I pulled one arm forward and looked at it. The cuts were starting to bleed again. I wiped them up with a tissue before pouring some iodine onto a cotten ball. I dabbed it onto each scar as Tamaki squirmed in pain. Once I was done that, I put some cream on each one then proceeded to wrap bandages up her arm. I repeated this process with her other arm.
"I'll stay here tonight. I'll share the bed with you" I told her. All she could do was nod. I pulled Tamaki close once we had laid down on the bed, closing my eyes and drifting off into sleep.