It's Not Cool | Jonas Brothers

Chapter 5

Pippa's P.O.V.
"Eat your dinner, Pippa." I look at the half empty plate in front of me. "I can't." I tell my mom. She sighs.

"Why can't you anymore? You've barely touched your plate." She says. I know I've barely touched it and I know it worries my parents.

My dad looks concerned, seeing the amount of food that's still left on my plate. I can't tell them how hard it is for me to pick up for my fork and to put food in my mouth.

They wouldn't understand. It's fuel that keeps you alive, I should embrace it. But I can't.

I shrug my shoulders. "I'm sorry mom, I'm really trying." I tell her. She smiles sadly to let me know that she's only worried and not disappointed in me. Though I'm sure she is disappointed in me in general and it hurts.

I hate that I let down my parents. I want them to be proud of me, not disappointed.

"Have you seen the boys today?" Frankie tries to change the subject.

"Yes, we've seen the boys. They are okay. They've been practicing a lot." Dad says happily. We are all really happy that they are on the same page again. It really wasn't fun to be in the middle of their fights.

"How was school today?" Mom asks us. Frankie and I share a look before shrugging our shoulders. "Can't have been better than your day." Frankie says.

"It's been the same really. Long and boring." Mom and dad both laugh.

"When do we get to see them?" Frankie suddenly asks after a long silence.

"Soon honey. I can't promise you when, but soon." Mom answers.

After another while, we all turn our heads towards the door, because we hear a key.

"I knew it would be soon, but not this soon." Dad says.

We all stand up. Mom and dad because they're happy the boys are home, but Frankie and I stand up in shock because they are home.

Soon the three boys I currently envy most walk into the big kitchen. I back up, not wanting to be close to them.

"Franster, how are you?" Kevin starts. Everyone greets each other happily while I walk over to grab myself a glass of water. I only do that so I can turn away from them.

"Pippa?" I hear Nick ask me. It's quiet, so everyone's probably looking at me.

"What do you want?" I finally turn to face them. They look sad. Why are they sad?

"We want our family back." Joe speaks.

"Why? I like how it's now." Frankie shoots me a look. He knows how I hate it, but I'm not willing to forgive them for what they did to me.

How dare they waltz in and think that everything is suddenly okay. If that were the case, then they should have made up their own arguments way sooner.

"Pippa.. We know we made a mistake. Can't you forgive us for it?" Nick tries.

I laugh and take a sip from my water.

"Funny how you took months to resolve your issues and think that you can walk in here, disturb our dinner, and think I'll run into your arms forgiving you for abandoning us like that. You didn't even respond to my texts!" My voice raises while I talk and by the end I was yelling.

"We know. We're sor.." I cut him off. "You're sorry? What do I do with a sorry?" I laugh manically about it.

Nick wanted to respond, but Frankie grabbed his shoulder to keep him from doing so. Smart move. "Let me," he said.

Frankie walks around the island towards me.

"What are you doing?" He asks me. "This is what you dreamed about. They're back."

"I know they're back. I just... I can't Frankie. I can't." I shake my head.

"Don't let them walk out of your life for good." I look at him. "Me? Tell them that." I tell him.

I hoist myself up onto the counter.

"You have every right to be angry. We would be angry too. I wish I could explain it to you, but nothing justifies what we did to you. We hurt you. Especially me and I hate myself for that." Nick tries to reason with me and I'm sure he feels extra guilty because he knows we're closer to each other.

"No. Nothing can justify what you did. And no. No one gets special treatment, Nick. You all equally hurt me by not talking to us, not responding to my texts, not answering my calls when I called. I know Frankie forgives you, but I also know he won't forget. He wants things to go back to how they were, but I can't yet. I need time." I explain.

All seem to get that.

"Did something happen to you while we were away?" Nick asks eyeing me suspiciously.

Please don't go there.

"No, nothing happened. Why?" I ask him while trying to keep my cool. Frankie eyes me worriedly.

"It seems as if something happened which we haven't been able to protect you from and you blame it on us." Nick says.

I shake my head. "Nothing happened. I was lonely. I know I had our parents and Frankie" Frankie puts his hand on my knee as I continue "and our grandparents and everyone. I missed you." I finish.

The three have their heads down in shame.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask them. They all look up. "Can you please not do this again? Please?" They all share some looks before answering.

"We won't. We love you." Joe says.

I get off the counter and walk over. Nick stood closest, so I walk over to him first to give him a hug.

Frankie walks over and joins the hug. So do Kevin and Joe.

"I'm so so sorry. I missed you. I love you." Nick whispers.

"I love you and missed you too." I whisper back.

Joe and Kevin both agree with us.

"I hate to interrupt, but please finish your dinner now, Pippa." Mom tells me. I get out of the big brother sandwich and sit back down to hopefully eat the rest of my dinner.