It's Not Cool | Jonas Brothers

Chapter 55

Thirty thousand reads!! This is so incredible and so unbelievable!! It's insane how far this story has come. It's a dream come true!

Sorry for the long wait... It's a little longer to make up for the wait and as an extra for the thirty thousand reads, so enjoy!!

Pippa's P.O.V.
I never left Nick's room after I apparently had been MIA the whole day.

I know I scared my family again, but I didn't have the strength to get up yet.

After a while, Joe entered the room and sat on the edge of the bed next to me.

"How are you?" He asks me. "Tired." I answer him.

"How come you are tired? You obviously slept a lot." He says.

"I know." I sigh.

"How's Philippine? The girl you've been talking to." I ask him.

"Oh she's great. I've found a good friend in her. I listen to her, she listen's to me. We help each other." He answers.

"That's nice." I smile at him.

I sit up to make more space for Joe, which he takes.

"You know? You should shower more often." I tell him.

He actually sniffs his armpit. His face scrunches up in disgust. Despite the horrible smell, I can't help but laugh out loud.

"You laugh, missy. I'll get you back for that." He threatens.

"Yeah, right you will." The sarcasm drips from my voice.

"Hey, Joe?" I grab his attention back from his thoughts.

"Yeah?" He answers.

"Do you think life has a purpose in store for everyone?" I ask him.

"And you're asking me that? Nick is more homey in the philosophy department." Joe responds.

"Do you even know how to spell philosophy?" He tilts his head, thinking about how to spell the word.

"F. H. Y. L. Phyl. Phyloso." I put my hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Don't go there. You'll only get hurt." He shrugs his shoulder and a smile appears on his face.

"But to answer your question. I have no idea. I just try to make the best of every day. I know our family has gone through some hard times. Back when we were little, recently as well, but I'm not trying to let it put a demper on how I live my life right now." He says.

"That's very philosophical of you." I say.

"F. H. I. L." I cut him off. "Please don't, Joe."

"But I know I'm on the right way this time!"

It's silent until Joe decides to break it. "You know what?" I give him a questioning look.

"Do you remember when we were little? We went out to the park one day." When didn't we? But that's not the point right now.

"We ended up going back home because you had another terrible hallucination. Probably one of the worst ones I ever had to watch you go through." He turns to me and I don't miss the tears in his eyes.

"Every time you had another hallucination, I wished it would be the last one you'd have. They were awful. You didn't know what was going on. You never looked us in the eyes and you always hid yourself away. You fell apart whenever you had one. We couldn't reach you and I always felt trapped. That particular one. You'd been screaming in pain. We all begged for you to come back, but you didn't. I felt as if my hands were tightened up. So helpless." He pauses to let out a sob and I can't help but feel guilty for everything bad I put on our family.

"The hallucinations got worse with each one you had. I remember holding Nick with his back towards you and his face hidden in my chest and my arm around his head so that he couldn't hear and couldn't see you. Not that he wanted to see it. He was shaking from fear and crying. You wouldn't calm down and mom was about to call for an ambulance, but then you calmed down. It was terrible to watch mom and Kevin trying to get close to you and you only fought them off, thinking they were out to hurt you." He tries to say through his sobs.

"I really thought I was going to lose you that day. Whether you went somewhere else to get help or if they put you down and brought you somewhere else or if you hurt yourself so that they had to take you. I didn't know what was going to happen. Up until recently, that was the worst thing I had went through until you ran away."

"I trusted you, but I didn't know what was going on. Every minute I spend thinking, was spend on you. Where were you? Were you okay? Were you hallucinating? Did you try to hurt yourself? Did you die? Did you end up in a hospital or jail or somewhere worse?"

"I used to use Kevin as an enormous teddy bear, because you and Nick wouldn't do that for me." I let out a snort as he continues. "Nick had always been great to mislead into doing my school projects and homework. I can't imagine you haven't used him for that either." I shake my head. I have had a lot of help from Nick with my schoolwork in the past.

"And you were you. I can't really explain what you mean to me. I know we are a big family and I've got four siblings who mean everything to me. Even if I barely showed it to you in the past. But someone had to be the annoying brother to you. It gave you the courage to speak up." That is right. He made me use my voice. "And you have always been the awesome sister. The only sister I had." I give him a nudge in the side, but he said it with a smile, making me realize he really does love me, despite everything he put me through when we were little.

"And no matter what happens with our family. I can't ever lose you. Never. That's impossible. Promise me you'll stay. I don't care how you do it. Talk to me. Talk to Nick like you used to. Talk to mom or to dad, to Kevin or to Frankie. I don't mind who you talk to. Even if they are a stranger but be alert to the fakers who only want a story for social media. Get help if you need it. Ask us for help if you need it. But please. I'm begging you and am about to get on my knees for you. Don't leave us again. You have to promise me right here and right now that you'll stay."

I keep quiet, not really knowing how to respond.

"I'll stay." I whisper. I have to promise him. I see how much it hurts him and I can't say no to him. I don't know how I'm going to do it yet, but I will. I promised Joe and I had promised Nick before. I have to keep it now.

"But you have to promise me you'll slap me out of it if I don't." I make him promise.

"I will. I will keep you grounded to my best abilities." He promises. We seal the deal with a long hug. "Please don't turn me into your new bearhug Kevin." I tell him. He laughs. "You just wait." He says evilly.

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