Been feeling really low in mood today. My brain is so conflicted and it is exhausting. One part of me just doesn't want to deal with all this, thinks death is the best and easiest way out. The other part is telling me to stay strong and keep safe, that I'm in the right place to get the help to get through this. It's as if people are voting for either of the options and the polls are so close that both sides kept switching from 49% to 51%. It literally takes a second for my brain to change which side is stronger.
If I'm going to listen to the side that says to keep safe it means a longer stay in hospital. I would start impatient trauma therapy. I can only do it as an impatient and once started I would be too unsafe to go home. It's gonna be very triggering and bring up a lot of things that I have kept hidden for so long. I'm not able to do this sort of therapy out of hospital because if I do get triggered I still haven't learnt the skills to stay out of a crisis. I'm not happy that it means staying longer, but it is the right place to be able to explore and and uncover these emotions and memories safely. It is a step in the right direction to a better quality life.
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My Journey To Normality (Part 2)
Short Story•This is a story based on true events about someone who is on their journey to recovery from mental illness. Their questioning of gender and sexuality. Going through relationships and break ups. Just an all about coming of age story of a person that...
