Amor

~Chapter 8~

I'm on the floor at the bottom of the stairs with a fresh new bruise on my forearm and my back hurts terribly, meaning I most likely have bruises there too.

I didn't hear anything crack on my way down so I'm sure nothing is broken this time. I know I should get up and hide until papa and Jay get home but I can't find it in myself to move. I'm so tired and everything hurts.

"What? Not gonna try to run this time cabrona?" Mama is standing at the top of the stairs with that smug look of hers. She's used to me trying to fight back to get away from her and she hates the chase. Right now she's probably proud of herself for finally getting me to break. Trust me, if I could stand up for myself, I would but my body is too exhausted. I've been through this abuse for four years now.

I'm eight years old and getting smacked around by the woman who gave birth to me. The girls at school my age are with their moms going shopping for their first day of class outfits and I'm here with tears falling down my face.

"C'mon get up. Let's see if you can huh?" She starts walking down the steps towards me, taunting me. My limbs refuse to work and it's like I'm paralyzed. My mind is pleading for them to move but my muscles aren't listening.

"GET UP!" She's standing next to me now and there goes my window of opportunity to run. It's time to use plan B in this situation. If I do as she says and let her do what she wants, it'll be over sooner.

"You're so worthless you know that? I should've gotten rid of you when I found out I was pregnant." She spits at me and the next thing I feel is her foot connect with my side. I scream out curling into a ball trying to protect myself cause it's all I can do. She roughly grabs my hair and lifts my face up to smack my cheek. The loud sound of it rings in my ears causing me to drown out her insults.

She goes on like this for a bit longer until she feels like I've had enough. When she finally walks away satisfied with her work, I'm sporting an array of new purple and blue marks. Lying there on the floor I force myself to think back to a time when this wasn't my life. Back to that windy day where mama stroked my hair and told me papa and Jay would be okay. If I think hard enough, I can almost feel her hand gently touching my hair and I can hear the sounds of the harsh wind breezing through the trees.

"AHH!" I sit up abruptly in bed with tears in my eyes. My heart's racing too quick again and my vision is blurred by my river of tears. The fire in my lungs is enough to let me know my daily morning routine is happening. Breathe Sophia, c'mon.

I hear footsteps running towards my room from the hallway. I can't see properly but I know when the door opens that Jesse is here.

"Sophie! Sweetheart you're okay. C'mon focus on me. Breathe with me." He sits beside me on the bed and rubs a hand on my back. The pain in my chest isn't getting any better, in fact, it has spread to my head. I grip my hair harshly no matter if it adds to the pain, I feel like it's all I can do.

"No Soph, let go. You're gonna hurt yourself more if you do that. Let go." Jesse cooes in my ear. The hand that isn't rubbing my back goes to gently remove my hands from my head.

"I c-can't!" I muster out in staggering breaths. Stupid lungs... work!

"I know it hurts but please focus on me. You'll feel better. Here give me your hand." He takes my hand and places it on his heart.