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"Wake up, mamas," I felt Billie's hand on my shoulder shaking me awake. Her hand was expectedly really cold, and I shivered as it touched my skin.
I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes. It was 6:30am on a Wednesday. I could only imagine why Billie would wake me up this early. The sun wasn't even up yet.
I got ready in record time, only 10 minutes. Billie told me to not wear my uniform, so I got changed into baggy grey sweatpants and a bralette. I straightened my hair and let it all down for once. Billie watched me the whole time, her eyes low.
We left around 6:45, when girls who wanted an early start were just starting to wake up. On the way to wherever Billie held my hand loosely. It was a comforting feeling.
"Where're we going, Billie?" I asked but she shushed me. She led me into a small room near the south of the school with a narrow staircase leading upwards.
I couldn't help but feel like she was taking me somewhere to be murdered, with how quiet she was being. "C'mon." Billie said and pulled my gently up the stairs. At the top there was a fire escape door that said 'Southern Roof'.
I got excited when I saw the sign. From the age of 5 I was always fascinated with heights: how high could I be before I'd actually fall? There was something so enthralling about seeing the world lie below you while you stood above it all, having relentless wind blow against your body, threatening to pull you down.
My dad took me to my first roof on my 5th birthday, at midnight. I remember him holding me tightly as he placed me on the ledge, never letting me go. The first thing I took in was how insanely clear the air was up there, how every gust of wind was sharp and cold. I remember looking down and feeling exhilaration rush through me. I remember that I loved it.
I followed Billie onto the roof and gasped at the beautiful view. We were so high up, so the students below us looked like little dots. Billie sensed my excitement and smiled softly as I got on the ledge, closing my eyes.
She just stood there and watched me as I calmly teetered on the edge. I opened my eyes and smiled at her. Billie's face looked intrigued, like she was looking at a puzzle she didn't understand. It was the first time she had properly looked at me, since we first met.
I looked down at the city below me. It was so beautiful. The sun was just starting to come up, covering everything with an orange luminescent glow. The wind was a soft breeze and I breathed it all in. Next to me there was footsteps and I saw Billie step onto the ledge too.
I could tell it was her first time, by the way she gripped my hand. Her hands frosted over and yet she smiled at me, a genuine small smile that I locked in my memory bank to keep forever.
Nobody had ever wanted to do this with me, and the fact that Billie did, meant something to me.
After a long time of enjoying the calm if exhilarating moment, we both stepped down. Billie sat on the concrete and leaned against the ledge, patting the space in between her legs.
