Fifty Shades of Jeon|| Lizkook ff||

Dangerous lust

Lisa's P.O.V.

It was weird. The dinner was huge and I also did not understand why his mother made such a big scene of us. And by the way, he told me his mother died because of an overdose when we were at the lake where he...raped me.
I was so confused by now but I didn't want to ruin this evening.
So I started to talk to people here and there. They all were really friendly even though you could feel some of their fake faces.
It was...pretty okay until I saw Jungkook walk away with this elder woman, Jisoo I think.
I assumed they knew each other and didn't want to be the crazy girlfriend who does not allow her man to speak with other women, so I just let him go with her. He was loyal after all.

They came back after around 30 minutes and Jungkook lookes kind of different. He seemed to be more nervous. But I did not think much about it since who knows what she had told him. It's always strange to meet old old friends.
Then the dinner began. I have to admit I haven't eaten such expensive food before. It seemed to be more expensive than the food in the restaurant Jungkook had taken me for his...meetings.

I brushed the thoughts off and tried to focus on the delicious food.
But then, I noticed Jungkook's pants move. He always wears so tight pants, like seriously, why does he need to show off like that?
Anyways,  I noticed and offered him to help him. First he said yes. Then he suddenly changed his mind and said no.
I was so confused. And I didnt even know that I could become more confused than I already was.
"Oh, okay." I said and tried to focus on the taste again.

But I am not blind. I saw how he looked at this Jisoo. I didn't know her so I wasn't allowed to hate her or to talk bad about her but something inside of me tells me that she is not a good person, or at least I will get in trouble because of her.

"Yes, the dinner was amazing. Thank you for inviting us" I smiled at Jungkooks mother and bowed my head. "Ah~ no need to thank me. You are a part of our family now, even though you're a bit young."
I just chuckled. I didn't understand why she always had to criticise my age. Seriously, I am even a few months older than Jungkook!
"Excuse me, please." I needed to go to the toilet. So I smiled and looked for it.

I didn't want to take the guest toilet because then I had an excuse to look around a bit.
So i went upstairs again. This time, I looked at a few more pictures that were hanging on the wall.
There were some family pictures but Jungkook wasn't younger than 7 at any of these. I stopped walking in front of a picture with another woman that wasn't part of the family.
She was holding Jungkook's hand and their bodies were close to each other. Jungkook seemed to be like 16 or 17.

"Isn't that a beautiful picture?" a voice asked. I jumped a bit because it scared me.
I turned around and spotted Jisoo.
"Oh, um,  yes."
Then it kind of hit me. "The woman, at the picture...-"
"Yes, honey, that's me. Me when I was around 26. Jungkookie is 16 at this photo."
"So...you were his teacher?! The sexy woman he had his first borner for! And the woman who he slept with for the first time!"
She chuckled "Yes, thats me."
My eyebrows went down and I suddenly felt such an anger inside of me. My heart could explode and I just wanted to throw hands at her.
"Youre the woman who made Jungkook a sex-addict. You showed him this bad coping mechanism and you hurt him! You made him go crazy and you made him think the only thing that helps him is sex!"

"Oh, honey, please. He asked for it."
Tears formed in my eyes and I fought to hold them back. "He was a child! He was a hurt child that had lost his family and had to adjust to a new one, a child that never learned to handle his sadness, anger and pain! You as the adult knew exactly what you was doing! You manipulated him and used him for your fun!"
"I had his agreement." she shrugged.
"He DID NOT KNOW WHAT HE WAS DOING! Because of YOU he is still in much pain and had to learn how to LOVE properly! Because of YOU, he hurt many other women! Because of YOU, he raped me and-"

"Honey, please. I do not want to listen to your sad life stories. I'm not interested in your autobiography, okay? Why don't you write a diary entry about it?"
This woman turned around and left.
Okay, that was too much. She is only 10 years older than I am and I am an adult.
She is a danger. Where's Jungkook?

Jungkook's P.O.V.

I knew my feelings were wrong. They were so wrong. I loved Lalisa! And I did not need anyone from my past. Lalisa was everything I've ever wanted. So why did this needs came up again?

I was sitting in the garden, alone. I needed to think but then suddenly someone sat down next to me.
"Mother? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with your guests?"
"My son", she said and took my hand, "how was your walk with Jisoo?"
Oh no. Some old feelings came up again.

"And don't forget your homework, babyboy." she smiled.
"Yes mommy- I mean Miss Kim. I will be a good boy!" and I smiled back.
She gave me a quick kiss on my cheek and then left.
I knew what I had to do so I went to the garden and sat down in front of the little fountain. And then I waited.
I waited for my mother. And then she came.
"My son, how was your meeting with Jisoo?"
"It was amazing! She wanted to explain maths to me but then..." and I told her everything.
She said yes to our relationship with one condition; I needed to tell her very detail without questioning.

"S-she" I started to shiver. My hands were shaking and my breath became uneven. "S-she tried t-to touch me... N-no, she did touch me b-but I said n-no."

"Oh, my son. Why? I told you years ago that Jisoo is the woman you love, the love of your life. She is allowed to touch you. And she needs to."
"M-mom... I know... And I want her to do it but i-i can't."
And suddenly, I felt like a helpless 16 years old boy again.
My mother has triggered everything that she could have triggered. She knows I hate this house because it makes memories come up. She knows my story with Jisoo and she knows what she has to say or do to make me her little son again.

I tried to fight against it. "I-i really can't. I l-love Lalisa and-"
"Shhh" this sound! I turned around and Jisoo was standing behind us. She always made "shhh" with her soft lips when I was sad, or in pain, or angry, or stressed, or crying when I was a teenager. All this, everything, made me this poor little boy from 7 years ago.
And how was I supposed to fight against it when all these feelings were still inside of me? I should have listened to Lisa and started a therapy. And now it was too late.

Jisoo was sitting next to me and held me in her arms, softly rubbing my back and playing with my hair. Just like she did in the old days.
I hated her for that. I hated her and my mom but at the same time, I loved her for that.
"It's okay,  my baby. It's okay to cry."

I didn't even know I was crying until then. "I-i missed this..." I said and she kissed my head. "I missed you, too."

"How about you two go to Kookies room?" my mom asked.