Jars of Stars

Seven Synapses

(formerly, there were six. I added one recently.)
1. I would let my fingers sprawl onto the piano keys, letting each curved knuckle plink notes that would all link together like musical chains. And as I would sing and let my voice mingle with the ivory and ebony hums, you would vocalize the harmony. We sounded like two bluebirds fluttering in the sky, our voices linking talons above the clouds and falling to the ground, just to dash back up, a roller coaster belly flop that wouldn't stop.

2. I would let my fingers scrawl raw emotions onto paper, translate my synapses into words that most people still don't understand, but you did. Your mind thinks in vast skies and dissonant chords and galaxies just like mine. The only difference is that your eyes project your imagination on paper with your pencils so the memory forever lingers. Mine do the same, but only wise eyes can see the picture.

3. When I entered the battlefield called high school, the sky where I would learn to fly, the fully fledged sparrows and crows darted above my tiny blue head, swooping down in troops with feathers that would never wither. But you kept me under your wing, listened to what I had to say, and didn't let me fly away. You bring out my true voice, rejoicing me with the extravagant emotion called joy. It's so surprising that you're just a boy on the outside while on the inside, your veins are stained with stardust and your brain and mouth aren't chained - you can say whatever you please. And if birds had knees they'd all be bowing, including me, because you are the king of the secret world that only the artists' eyes can see.

4. You are the key that unlocks the real me, the hand that takes off the mask on my face, the arms that whisper a soft embrace. Each time I look at you the race to going completely insane becomes shorter and easier because each glance is like mercury, but it's so fun to swirl the silver around in my hands, get it in the cracks and the palm lines so I can shine, too. One day it will all be too late and the gleam will take over my dreams. But it's okay because you will be there.

5. Today I looked at you and all the light seemed to evaporate from your eyes as if light is a tangible thing. Maybe it was heat instead because I felt colder after it happened. I'm trying not to give you the cold shoulder but getting close to you sets my heart on fire and my mouth fills with smoke. I choke on my own worries and I have to leave. I'm sorry I haven't conquered my fear of burning yet. I'm still learning how to use my tears to quench the flames but they are only gasoline as I've seen, so I'm trying to teach myself how to speak watery words while trying not to drown myself and everyone around.

6. Our sound floods my mind like a hurricane and a tsunami combined. Each note was like a boat afloat in a sea of love but then the sky started swirling and hurling hailstones from above and pretty soon we had lost the oars and we were soaring out of control, crashing into blades and rocks and spades, each one made of my own words. I probably should have steered our tiny boat a different way but this has happened at least thirteen times before and I've learned in history class that the future is no mystery at all.

7. I've taught myself how to swim. I've paddled through the icy water with blue lips and a numb tongue and I never noticed you trying to keep up with me until I pulled myself onto the rocks and you climbed up behind me. And with your nearly broken voice that hadn't spoken to me in days you sang. You took me under your wing again, and I began to sing with you. At that moment, all of the waves fell asleep, the deep blues of the storm were now pastels and the hell that once burned me alive from inside my heart had smoldered away. And with my head on your shoulder now it's all ethereal - I don't know if anything is real because I've never experienced a felicity like this. I've never flown at such a velocity that I feel like I'm going to crash but something sticks me to the breeze like Velcro from my feathers. And even better, you fly by my side, our melodic tune ebbing and flowing like a tide and I hope it never subsides. I never want to end this roller coaster ride, I never want my voice to die. Because after the choice you made, a dawn thrives in my music, and it has yet to fade to day.