On the rare days he was actually off, all he wanted to do was sleep. Check out completely for a minimum of eighteen hours. Like he could somehow compensate for the severe sleep deprivation he ordinarily suffered. As if it was a thing he could bank and use as he needed it.
Somehow he had either been blessed by neighbors who understood his plight, or walls thick enough to cancel out the noise of them going about their daily lives. Later he would find out that it was actually Seokjin's brother who was the cause of the near perfect silence - he worked nights as well, and had single-handedly glared each and every person into submission. A fact that he was eternally grateful for. Enough that it almost made him forget just how unwelcoming the tiny omega had been during that first meeting, when a plate full of stale baked goods had been shoved into his hands and he practically been growled at.
That there would be a knock on his door just as the sun began to set was an inconvenience he didn't want to deal with, and for a moment he simply ignored it. Until it came again and he found himself pushing himself up and out of bed, not even bothering to find a shirt. He was covered enough to tell someone to fuck off.
"What the fuck do you - oh." Except it wasn't just someone coming to disturb him. No. It just had to be that cute little omega. And he just had to be seeing him like this. With nothing but a pair of looose pajama pants slung low across his hips and his hair all messy.
"I'm sorry, alpha. I thought you would be awake by now." He looked so soft and apologetic and really he couldn't even find a little bit of anger.
"It's alright, little one." Truly Seokjin did look so much smaller than him. Not quite as tiny as Jimin had been but - but he had to stop right there. He wouldn't compare them. He would not. That was exceptionally unfair to both of them. "Is everything alright?"
"Mm, everything's fine. It's just that my brother's at work and I never seem to be able to make just enough food for me. So I thought I'd see if you were hungry."
"Starving, actually." He hadn't eaten since his last break a good twenty or so hours ago, and the thought of a home cooked meal instead of take out was enough to make his mouth water.
"I thought you might be. I'll get it and bring it over."
"Wouldn't it be easier for me to come to you?"
"Yes, but my brother will kill me if I let an alpha in the house without him knowing."
"Your brother is pretty protective over you, isn't he?"
"It's just been the two of us for a long time. He hasn't had much of a choice." For a split second he sounded sad, before his face changed back I to a smile. "Go put a shirt on. I think I can hear the lady in 4C starting to pant at the sight of you."
...
They ate Japchae and it was so amazing that he practically licked the pan clean when they were finished. It had been so long since an Omega had cooked for him, had shown any sort of care towards him at all. Despite how he kept reminding himself how unfair it was to mentally compare Seokjin to Jimin, there was still a secret little tally being kept. And his angel was clearly already coming out on top.
"That was delicious." It had been hot and flavorful and he couldn't imagine how lucky the others brother was to have it every single night. "Thank you, Seokjin. It's been a while since I've had a meal this good."
"Of course, alpha. I wanted to do something for you. To say thank you for driving me to class."
"You don't have to thank me, little one." He was trying to avoid the names he had once called Jimin, afraid they would only be a constant source of painful memories he no longer wished to suffer. "I enjoy spending time with you."
"Alpha -" There was that sad tone again, and he wanted to ask why it only ever seemed to occur when he got a little too serious. Maybe Seokjin just wasn't looking for something permanent. He was still young. It made sense. "I enjoy spending time with you too."
"Cheer up, little one. You can spend as much time with me as you want." Reaching out, he ever so gently nudged Seokjin's chin with his curled finger, forcing his eyes upwards to meet his own.
"We -" It was difficult to remember so many things when the alpha was staring at him like that. And all of them were exceedingly important, imperative bits of information that he should never let slip his mind. "We can scent now, if you want. My brother won't be home until morning."
"Are you sure?" His alpha was screaming at him to take the invitation, to spread his scent all over this beautiful little omega. It had been so long since he'd been able to claim anyone as his that the thought alone was enough to drive him crazy.
"Mm." He was already tilting his head, baring his throat and scent gland, a sign of submission given so easily it made his head spin.
Leaning in, he slowly nudged his nose against the gland in the omegas neck, sighing as the strong hints of vanilla bloomed, and he relished in it. Rubbed his cheek against it, savoring the way it washed over him. Nuzzled in with his own throat, sea breeze blossoming and mixing with thick sweetness and it was intoxicating. Had him pressing his lips ever so softly against a pulse point and nipping, his alpha instincts telling him to bite and claim but he resisted. Pulled himself back when he was drunk on warmth and sugar.
Seokjin looked just as ruined, eyes wide and glassy, lips pink and swollen from being bitten. And he wanted to kiss them then. See if they tasted as sweet as the the little omega smelled.
But he didn't get a chance, because suddenly, all at once, Seokjin was coming back to his senses, pulling away and lifting a hand to his throat, massaging lightly as if trying to force the new scent into his very skin.
"Thank you, alpha." To share your scent with another was something highly personal, another form of claim. One that told others you belonged to this specific person and there was no changing that.
In a way, Seokjin now belonged to Jungkook, for as long as the scent would last.
"I better get back." Picking up the pan, plates and chopsticks, he balanced them all perfectly before standing. "Maybe we can do this again."
"I'd like that." He was tempted to ask if he meant the food or the scenting, but he didn't actually have the courage. All he could think was that Seokjin always finished their interactions so quickly. Like he suddenly remembered he had somewhere to be.
Maybe he did. But Jungkook didn't ask, so he still didn't know.
...
Maybe it had been a mistake. Allowing himself a little sliver of hope, a thought that maybe something still remained in this world for him. A little bit of happiness that still remained after everything else had been take by force.
He hadn't wanted this. Hadn't wanted to walk around each and every day feeling like a part of his soul was missing. To still be able to feel his heart beating in his chest yet carry the knowledge that it was incomplete. That he was a half who had once been part of a whole. And now he was nothing. Just one of the few rare beings who carried the scars of having their bond broken and somehow surviving.
He wasn't meant to be alone. It wasn't who he was. He needed someone to protect, to love and to cherish. Someone who would stand beside him in the good times, and who would hold him up when his body grew heavy and tired and weak. Someone who would stand in front of him, a force that couldn't be reckoned with. He needed to be taken care of, to feel that love and support. Needed someone else. Needed to be whole again.
Yet all he had now was himself, and he tried to keep the angel out of his dreams. Tried not to think the ray of sunshine and hope that took the form of Seokjin.
But he was always there, hovering around the edges of his every thought. And he wondered if this was the new beginning he had prayed for, or the bitter end he had once wanted.
