Black Fray (Ruby, Suicideboys Story - completed)

XII

Shaina

I couldn't go back to sleep now. That was obviously someone close to Ruby because she was making the sorts of sounds that you only make when your more than friends. I was relieved when $crim asked me to go for breakfast. I pulled on the first things I saw not caring if they matched or if i looked a state and we headed out. We sat in this cute cafe and ordered food and well needed coffees.

I felt comfortable with $crim, he looks scary at first glance but he makes me feel safe. I don't know what he was like before he was sober but for a man who struggles with his own demons he will put aside his issues to help you with yours first. Not a lot of people will do that, let alone a famous rapper. He's even decorating my bedroom at his to cater to me. He says it's his brother but I have a sneaky suspicion that he had something to do with it.

I wanted to curl up and cry when he mentioned Ruby and that girl... My heart hurt. I thought there was something between us but I was obviously mislead or maybe I was being naive. I sit deep in thought feeling sorry for myself. Why do I get myself in these situations? Am I that desperate to feel loved that I'll just fall for the first person that gives me some attention. I need to get myself out of that headspace, my past can't control my whole life. I'm a grown woman now.

We head back and pack up. I can't even look at Ruby. He had no reason to lie or hide the truth from me. Unless he just wanted to get in my pants. Which is a dick move. I stay quiet, to be honest I don't think I've spoken since the cafe. I sit in my bunk writing some songs. I'm in the broody mood that's great to write songs. I clock the time knowing we will be heading to the venue shortly. I do simple makeup with a wing eyeliner. Pull on my ripped jeans and some strappy heels because I can hear Jeni tottering around in hers. I pull a black velvet crop top on with no bra and my leather jacket to hide my bruised sides. I know I look good. And I know Ruby will be pissed. Once I climb out of my bunk I know all eyes are on me, I act oblivious. Until Jeni points out a hickey on my neck. Shit how had I not noticed that. I didn't know where to look. Jeni thought it was $crim that gave it me. It would totally be easier if we just let her think that. So I walked over and planted a kiss on $crims lips. Everyone went silent for a second. Luckily $crim got with the program quickly and fixed his shocked face into a smile and put his arm around me. I finally looked at Ruby for the first time since last night and he did not look happy.

Serves him right.

As soon as we got into the venue $crim pulls me to the side and I practically spill my guts.

The rest of the night was super awkward, Jeni kept trying to talk to me and me while they performed, she was starting to annoy me. She wasn't a bad woman I just couldn't sit there and be nice when I would have easily slept with her boyfriend last night.  $crim had to play along with us being together, he was playing it up as well. Ruby just scowled at us the whole time. I found that quite funny considering he had Jeni practically glued to his lap.

We had decided to go out after because we couldn't stand to be cooped up in the bus with Jeni for that long. I sat next to $crim the whole time with his arm wrapped round my shoulder. It was nice. Not to be worried about upsetting him or watching how much I drank. He didn't drink so I knew he would look after me. I lent into him almost forgetting that this was only pretend. Jeni danced around Ruby practically giving him a lapdance. When she started to grind her ass on him I took that as my cue to go the toilet. I leaned on the counter taking deep breaths trying to get my emotions under control. I looked at myself in the mirror. I needed to get my shit together. He was just a boy. One that bit off more than he can chew. Fuck him. His loss. I fluffed my hair up and made my way back to our seats. There was a girl sat in my seat trying to flirt with $crim, he looked uncomfortable and was trying gradually move away from her. I stood with my arms crossed tapping my foot. I cleared my throat. She slowly turned her head to look at me. She looked me up and down and huffed. I motioned my head for her to move. She rolled her eyes and turned back to $crim. His eyes went wide. I kicked her foot.

"Move" I said flatly. She ignored me. That just pissed me off. I sat down in $crims lap pulling him in for a kiss. I hear the boys behind me laughing and cheering. The girl grunted and stormed off. I slid back into my seat smiling. $crim laughed draping his arm back round my shoulder. Jeni thought it was hilarious but Ruby excused himself and stormed off.

Once back on the bus I changed into pj shorts and sports bra and put a zip hoodie on and sat with the guys as they played Xbox. Ruby came sitting down saying Jeni had fell asleep drunk. She had drank quite a bit. Ruby had to practically carry her to the bus. I could feel his eye boring into me but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of me looking at him. It was making me feel awkward the longer I sat there. I stood up stretching knowing all eyes where on me. I smiled internally. I lent down tilting $crims face upto mine kissing him softly. I could see the guys watching in my peripheral vision. I smiled and went to my bunk