Sky Full Of Stars

Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Yesterday was a fun and at the same time a tiring day for me. Nadischarge na si Aunt Sally sa hospital at ngayon ay hindi muna s'ya pumasok sa coffeeshop, kasi sabi ng doctor na kailangan n'yang magpahinga.

I am currently enjoying my bowl of cereals habang nakaupo sa sofa while watching cartoons. Nostalgic. When I was still a little kid, nagsisiksikan kaming tatlo ni Mommy at Daddy dito sa malaking sofa. Naging habit na ni Mommy at Daddy na samahan akong manood ng cartoons tuwing breakfast, my Mom would prepare cereals for me and si Daddy naman s'ya ang gumigising sa 'kin tuwing umaga telling me that breakfast is ready and my favorite cartoon show is waiting for me.

Back then, I feel like I'm a living Disney princess, living in a big castle with the King and the Queen. But one day, the Queen disappeared—my Mom died. The King chose to sail on the deepest oceans. The princess was left all alone in the castle—the castle filled with happy memories na hindi na p'wedeng maibalik pa.

How I wish I can turn back the time to those good old days. When I was still a little princess, when the Queen was still alive and when the King chose to stay in the castle.

"Lyra, ayos ka lang ba hija?"

Agad akong napaayos sa pag-upo ko when I saw Manang Hilda standing in front of me with a worried expression written on her face.

"Ayos lang po? Bakit?"

"Umiiyak ka kasi, akala ko nanonood ka ng nakakaiyak na pelikula kaya sinilip kita 'yon pala cartoons lang ang pinapanood mo. Ayos ka lang ba?"

Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko and I realized that I'm crying. Bakit ba tuwing umiiyak ako ay hindi ko namamalayan? O baka nasanay na lang ako na palaging umiiyak to the point na hindi ko na maramdaman ang luha na tumutulo mula sa mata ko.

"Ayos lang po ako Manang Hilda, you don't have to worry about me."

After eating breakfast ay umakyat ako sa k'warto ko, and I started sketching Spencer's face para sa counseling namin ni Tita Madi mamaya.

Sometimes, I'm wondering kung hanggang kailan ako magiging ganito, you know having a fear inside my heart. I have to admit it, I'm so tired of my daily routine. Gigising ako ng umaga ng walang kasiguraduhan kung malalampasan ko ba ang araw na haharapin ko.

Well, life is full of uncertainties.

I spent hours sketching Spencer's face and after sketching ay sumalampak ako sa kama, hindi pa kasi dumating si Tita Madi.

Napatingin ako sa picture frame na nasa nakapatong sa isang table katabi ng kama ko. It was a picture of a 7 year old me smiling happily holding a big cotton candy and my Mom and Dad was laughing while staring at me—what a beautiful picture, but so painful to reminisce.

Kinuha ko ang picture frame and I hugged it, I miss this so much, I miss being with my Mom and Dad. Am I selfish to ask na sana namatay na lang kaming lahat no'ng gabi na naaksidente kami? Sana hindi lang si Mommy ang namatay, sana pati rin kami ni Daddy. Am I selfish to ask that?

"Lyra, and'yan na 'yong psychiatrist mo sa naghihintay sa sala!" sigaw ni Manang Hilda mula sa labas ng k'warto ko.

I fixed myself first at agad na bumaba. Naabutan ko si Tita Madi na nakaupo sa sofa, and she greeted me with a warm smile nang makita n'ya ako.

"Hi, Lyra."

I just nodded and smiled at her, umupo ako sa kabilang sofa at napatingin s'ya sa sketch na ginawa ko.

"Who's that?" tanong n'ya and I showed her the sketch.

"Spencer Ryan Perez, s'ya 'yong source of happiness namin sa grupo. S'ya 'yong pinakamasiyahin pero may problema rin pala s'yang pinagdadaanan, pero nalampasan naman n'ya 'yon."