Help Me (sequel to Save Me)

Chapter 145

In response to recent events regarding Daniel - I will no longer be mentioning him in this, or any other story. The things being said are no longer rumours and I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable by including him in this.

Trigger warning

At the side of the stage, Andy watches the boys perform, hoping that screaming words into the microphone for an hour and a half will help Remington release whatever anger in him.

There's someone at the front of the audience who starts shouting homophobic insults at the singer, and Remington shouts at him in the instrumental of Hang On To Yourself.

"How about you come up here and do my fucking job?" He threatens sharply.

The guy sticks a middle finger up at him.

Remington is fired up, and sticks his finger up right back. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SHOW!" He demands. "I DONT WANT YOUR HOMOPHOBIC MONEY!"

He storms off stage once the show is over and shoves past Andy angrily. "I'm sleeping on the couch!" He calls as he walks away, and Andy shakes his head, hearing the hurt under the anger.

"Remington, wait." Andy chases after the boy, who turns around violently, glaring.

"What?" He snaps.

"Come on, honey, I know there's something more going on. What's really wrong?"

Remington can't look at Andy. "Nothing!"

"Right. So you're this angry just because I said it might not have been Holly's brother then, are you?"

The singer nods. "Yes!" He insists, "so this is your fault!"

"I see. So this has nothing to do with these then, no?" Andy holds up a container of diet pills that he found in Remington's suitcase when he went back to the bus just after they went on stage.

Remington fiddles with his fingers and doesn't answer.

The older of the two sighs. He sees how Remington shrinks at the sight of the pills. "How long have you been taking them?"

Remington doesn't respond.

"Sweetheart, I'm not mad. Just talk to me, okay? I want to help you."

The boy looks everywhere but at his husband. "They're not mine," he mumbles, knowing Andy doesn't believe his lie. "Just since I was attacked."

"Why didn't you tell me? You know I would've helped."

Shrugging, Remington looks down in shame. "'cause I'm scared," he whispers, anger melting into sadness. "'cause I'm so scared, Andy." His eyes are glossy with fresh tears.

Andy takes his hand. "Hey, it's okay. There's nothing wrong with being scared. Do you need a hug?"

Remington nods slowly and sniffles. He leans into Andy and closes his eyes. "I don't know what to do," he murmurs, "because the only time I don't want to die is when I'm on these stupid fucking pills and I don't know what to do anymore." He wipes his eyes as Andy rubs his back, beyond grateful for the man.

"Listen to me, sweetheart, no matter how good it might feel when you're taking them, it is not the way to cope. I understand that you can't control it sometimes, and while I don't know what it feels like to struggle like you do, I am here, okay, and I am not going anywhere. I don't care how many times you tell me to piss off, I am here, with you, and I always will be, because I love you and I care about you so much." He sways slowly to soothe Remington.

"I didn't mean to shout before. I just-things got too much."

Andy kisses his head. "I know. It's okay. Like I said, I will always be here."