LOVE IS RISK (Man*Man)

chapter 8

Matt's POV

I can't believe that me ignoring him has done that to him, I went in the library to check about Alpha Derrick and I didn't find anything so I decided to just look for werewolves who are mated to vampires and guess what I found 'nothing'. No werewolf has ever mated with a vampire and that kind of uplifted my worry even more.

I thought I was protecting the both of us because what will happen when the pack and clan finds out, but what I didn't know is that he was suffering. What will he think now that he has found out that me ignoring him has been hurting him, but the thing about him rejecting blood is kind of new to me 'but what isn't new a bout all this'.

Him wanting my blood is understandable, we have to share our blood during mating but he wants to suck my blood like he is eating lunch 'how is it going to be, me being mated to a vampire'

"Matt, your joking right?" He asked and I shook my head no "do you know that, that has never happened like ever, maybe your mistaken"

"Am not mistaken, all the signs were there and I know it has never happened before" I said passing my hand through my hair "and we are both men, am not gay that's why have been keeping my distance".

"So are you going to reject me?" That is the question I don't have an answer for right now, I don't want to reject him because I want to have a mate but also accepting him is terrifying me. It's not like am afraid of my pack because I can just run away from here. I just can't wrap my head to the fact that he is a guy, am not gay for Goddess' sake.

"I don't know, I don't want to reject you but am not gay" I said and he looked away from me, he looks sad about my answer 'is he by any chance gay'

"If you can't accept or reject me, then what are you going to do ignore me, I have experienced that and it hurts" he looked back at me "whatever you do it's going to hurt so why don't you just reject me" he said sitting down, putting his head in his hands.

"I can't and I don't want to hurt you, you're my friend" he laughed bitterly while twisting his ring in his middle finger.

"Matt whatever you do it's going to hurt and I get it you're not gay" he has tears in his eyes "I made it through these last 3 days, I think I can make it through a rejection" he stood up from the couch going to the window, looking outside.

I kept quiet because I can't reject him, these 3days I have been thinking about him alot and I have to admit I missed him. Seeing him in pain is tearing me apart right now, all I need is time and to take this slow because it's scary. One day your fucking girls then the other your finding out that the person you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with is a man.

"Asher, all I need is time to cope up with this, maybe we can try it out slowly if you're up for it of course" I said and he turned around looking at me.

"Are you doing that out of pity because you know that if you reject me it will hurt me more than you because of your alpha blood" he said and I think he is getting angry "I don't want you to be with me out of pity just because am your friend or because I was there for you and you feel the need to repay me"

"That's not why am doing it" I said in a low voice.

"Then why are you doing it?" He yelled with tears falling from his eyes.

"Because am attracted to you" I yelled back and he was taken back with my response "but am just scared, I am not gay and it is terrifying"

"So you are attracted to me because of the pull right, if it wasn't there you wouldn't be attracted to me?" I have no answer for that, I really don't but when I was young I felt safe with him and I loved his skin but I don't know if I was attracted to him or not, I just noticed that I am indeed attracted to him when I saw him again on Sunday.