Ghost Boy // Lil Peep

23. Netflix part 2.

MacDaddy how the fuck did the passport people accept this photo for Peeps passport 😂😂 breaks like every rule for a passport photo 😂😂

Tagged LilPeep

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Mac sits back out on the balcony as summer starts to roll in, mornings are getting warmer and days hotter. They have been so much stronger and open since Seattle. They even start seeing a therapist to cope with miscarrying and get them back to mental state were there is a possibility of trying again. Peep brings her out a bottle of water, kissing her gently and squishing her face around while she waits for the Netflix crew to start filming. Given the last interview she is nervous for what is about to be asked of her. Sitting there with a smoke on the go to calm her nerves they start rolling.

"How did you feel when Peep left Schema to join GBC?" The interviewer asks her.

"Urm *she nervously laughs* I didn't know he was leaving to be honest. I think there was like 3 days where the GBC boys would come to the loft and I met them. They seemed nice but given how close I was with J and the rest of the crew I thought I would of known. I genuinely thought for like 2 days they were just here to make music *she laughs biting her nail* then I woke up one day to like 50 missed calls from my best friend Shay, she is J's girlfriend now and back then. I remember thinking to myself hmmm this is weird. She barely ever phones me in work. Half asleep I scroll through the notifications to see Peep has left the group and the boys have left the loft. This happened in a literal 2 hour period *she hold two fingers. Her long nails shine in the sun light* while I slept. I was blind sighted by the whole thing.I never expected it, J found Peep, gave him a platform to use, gave him the opportunities. In one swoop, Peep left the group, I lost living with my best friend and my friend. I was upset that he didn't discuss the decision with me. Thought we were a team, but looking back he was young, had these bright big eyes for the world and GBC were shiny nd new. They were  offering things that schema just couldn't at the time. They were a smaller crew, more exposure for the artists. It was a logical move looking back but I just wanted to be asked my opinion first *she nervously laughs* he still has those big bright eyes and I love him for it. He will always try to see the good in everything. I was sceptical at first, well for a while. The one thing I was nervous about was Peep has always tried to be everybody's everything, he is so caring. Which is one of the reasons I love him. If he had $20 and you needed $17 to get home he would give it to you and literally walk. Like he never wants anyone to go without. He would share his clothes, his money, buy everyone food and shelter them when they needed it. But the one thing that made me nervous was that he had not even been in this group for 5 hours before they had moved in to the spare bedrooms and just put mattresses in the open space. I was scared they were going to use him for his stuff. He didn't have a lot back then but what he did have he was very proud of it. Still is. We had a lot of parties and the boys always would have people round and I know that made Gus nervous. I remember when I was still doing freelance shows for friends. I was driving home one night maybe like 12/1 am and Gus rings me in like silent sobs, now I'm nervous because the last time the boys had a party and Gus had anxiety about it he ended up nearly ODing in my arms. That is a sight I will never get over. I'm like freaking out he is begging me to come because he does not feel comfortable in his own home but he doesn't want to kick people out because he doesn't want them to go without. When I get there, there has gotta be like 30/40 people in our loft. Which was big but not that big. Gus is literally sitting in the corner of our room against the closest crying because his anxiety is through the roof and does not know what to do. I look at him and ask if he wants to stay my place tonight. At this point I was living at the loft but hadn't technically moved in and still had my place with my friends. He looks me dead in the eyes with pain behind them and says "I don't want them to take my stuff" that broke my heart. You should be able to spend a night away from your home without the worrying the people you live with aren't themselves gonna abuse that trust or bring people back that will go snooping. I wanted to cry myself at that. I know he would ring Bex and Ryan as well like crying from inside the closest because their was people in our room and he couldn't get them to leave. GBC have a lot of friends and they have friends, it was always a reason to have a party. There was always people at the loft not just the ones that lived there. As much as I love a busy house and so does Gus at some points we just wanted time to ourselves without the worry someone was going to barge in. I know that he feels the same way even now. When we moved here *she lifts her arms to signal she meant London* there was this weight lifted off our shoulders. We finally have our own space. As much as we love the GBC boys. It was so nice to have this space that was ours. No one else" she takes a sip off her water when her phone buzzes on the table. Opening the Snapchat up from Peep she laughs showing the camera. "Peep just sent me this"

"My munchkin" she kisses her phones screen, looking up she sees Peep presses up against the glass. Laughing the camera turns around to get this innocent moment on film.

"You knew this would come up but what happened the first time you found Peep cheated on you?"

She looks up at the camera from her phone screen, taking a big sip of water. Nervously laughing. "I'm going to make this short and sweet because I don't want this film to dwell on our relationship. This is about his career. He made a mistake when he was young, he has paid for that mistake and he has done his time of punishment and guilt. I was obviously hurt and broken from the whole thing. It took me a while to get over but seeing me hurt over his actions was more pain than he ever wanted to feel and for that we are equal. We worked through that problem and made it out the other side stronger than ever. Him and Layla were never a think, she is deluded if she thinks they were. She nothing more than a groupie" Mac snarls at her name. "Moving on" she smiles at the camera in a menacing way.

"We've spoken to a few people and they've all describe him as everyone's everything. What do you think about that?"

"Is 100% true. He tries to be everybody's everything at great cost to his mental health. It was clear early on in GBC that he was the main attraction, the main pull for shows and merch. When he started making real money, he would share literally everything with everyone. He would share his clothes, his shoes, his ice, he would buy anyone food if they needed it. Let them stay in his house rent free, he has paid people's rent on a couple occasions. He paid his friend rent one time because he had no money which made him miss his rent and I picked it up a couple days later when I saw what happened. But they never have done that for him. Which makes my blood boil, when he really needed someone who was there? Me, and Ryan. It used to be Tracy. It always me who picks the pieces up *she wipes away tears* they don't treat him like he treats them and it breaks my heart. It breaks me heart knowing they don't truly appreciate him like I do, they don't see how caring he is. They just assume he will do it for them because he has done in the past. Like the first tour we did as a solo. They were all calling him like we are going on the this tour. Like why the fuck weren't we invited. He was crying in my arms like "Baby I give them everything and they still want more. I don't know what to do"  *she wipes away more tears* I just want to say this is not all of GBC but a lot. I think seeing his friends treat him like is one of the reasons why I've never expected big lavish dates or gifts with him. I am truly happy with spending time with him, that's what makes me happy. I don't need an overpriced meal to make me happy. Ever since I met him all I wanted to do was show him that there are some people that won't use you and do just love you for you. That's all I do is love him for him. It's worked so far *she wipes away the tears laughing through them* He never wants anyone to go without. I think he really struggles with the concept that he is doing better than other people and has more money than others. He wants everyone to have the same experience as him but I think what upsets him the most that he knows in the past people he's treated with his luxury wouldn't give him a dollar if he needed it *she shrugs her shoulders, tears not stopping* which is the sad sad truth about some people"