make me

23-aching heart

Tw: panic attack

"We'll see about that..." she smirked and walked up the stairs. I waited a couple of seconds before following her... she was definitely not going to keep her promise of 'no touching'.

We got upstairs, removed our makeup and changed our clothes to be comfortable. I glanced at Raven to make sure she wasn't going to jump on me or something and luckily, she was occupied every time I turned around. We got ourselves in the bed and turned the TV in Raven's bedroom on. She switched through a couple of channels until she got on the news.

"Did you think I wouldn't notice you repeatedly looking at me?" She said still looking at the screen in front of us, "you're pretty obvious about it,"

"Can you blame me?" I asked her sarcastically.

"Well, I guess I can't, huh?" She glanced back to me from the corner of her eye, "tomorrow I have things to do... I'm gonna have to leave you alone for the day, don't miss me to much." She winked at me.

"Don't worry, I wont," truth is, I knew I would. Normally, I liked being alone, but ever since I got here, I hated it. I have way to much time to think when I'm alone and right now, I have nothing good to occupy my thoughts with.

"Don't hurt me like that." She laughed and turned back to the TV while I did the same. The commercial break finished and a vampire in a blue suit appeared on the screen.

"Welcome back! After a couple of incidents where humans tried to riot, the king gave orders to show public execution until they stopped. Everyday, 5 humans will be executed and they will be chosen randomly. Humans, if you want this to stop, go back to your normal ways, you don't deserve to be free." The last sentence shocked me a bit, but I remembered that these are vampire and they have a cruel nature.

"So to start the ceremony, here are the first that had been chosen:"

I looked at the screen, horrified by the images showed. The first one was a little girl, she couldn't have been older than 12 and they executed her in front of her parents. The screams coming from them, when they saw the head of the little girl bounce on the floor were agonizing, horrifying to say the least. I felt tears come up, until I saw the second one being brought up and shock took over me.

"For second and third we have a couple, they have been stealing a lot and even if the police officers gave them warnings, they continued on with the malice."

My mom and dad came up on the stage, I felt my heart drop, it pounded slowly, not sure if it should be aching or relieved that they finally get what they deserve. My mother was the first one, she got on her knees with her eyes full of water and aligned her neck with the blade. I knew how the executions worked, my grandma wasn't the only one I saw being killed.

The blade came rushing down and before I knew it, her head was on the floor while her body was dragged out to give place to my dad. I felt Raven look at me, but as far as she's concerned, she didn't know those two were my parents. Silent tears were running down my face as I watched my dad being brought up to the same space my mother had perished moments before. He stopped to ask something to the executor, the vampire seemed hesitant, but accepted in the end.

"Bee, if you see this, I'm sorry for what we did to you..." he sobbed in between words, making him hardly comprehensible, "we deserve this..." he got pushed to his knees and soon his head was on the floor too.

"Are you okay?" Raven placed one hand on my back and moved in circles. I stood there in shock, still looking at the screen with my eyes full of tears, but not a single sound came out of my mouth.

I had nothing anymore, not even an excuse for parents or a house where I had some place to hide. I had nothing.

"No, no, no no no, NO!!!" I screamed from the top of my lungs with my head in my hands. I started slapping, punching myself, anything to try and feel something else than the burning pain in my whole body. I felt like my heart was going to come out of me or like it was squeezing in on itself, trying to hide from this pain filled world. I was bawling my eyes out while Raven took me in her arms.

"It's okay Bee, I'm here... I'll protect you with my life, I swear." She continued stroking my hair, but I wasn't having it. I pushed her off of me and ran down stairs. I opened the front door and walked outside. Taking in the fresh air, hoping it would help the burning sensation in my chest, but it didn't. I fell to the floor, loosing all sorts of force I had in me. I screamed, shouted and cursed to whatever was up there. I had to blame it on something for now.

It started raining so, I laid on the concrete floor and let the rain hit my face. It kinda felt comforting, it was cold, like my heart at that moment. Tears were still running down my cheeks and the only thing that separated them from the rain was the warmth. It reminded me that I was still human, I still had that spark in me which made vampires go mad. It reminded me that I had to keep fighting the pain or else they would be nothing good left in this world.

I cried for what felt like hours, but were probably 10 minutes. The front door opened, revealing Raven with a sorry look on her face. I looked back to the sky and ignored her. I heard footsteps come to me and unexpectedly, Raven laid down next to me.

"You know you're gonna catch a cold, right?"

"I don't care," my voice was monotone, it sounded like I had lost all hope... and I had.

"We can stay a bit longer, but we're gonna have to go back in the house eventually." Raven's voice was soft, for the first time, it was soft.

"I don't want to go back," I said a bit more sternly.

"You have to, you're gonna get sick and it'll just make it worst..."

"I said, I don't want to go back. I could die for all I care..." I closed my eyes and imagined myself never feeling sad again, and the only thing that could bring me that peace was death.

"I won't let you die, I still have a lot of self-work to do, but one day, I'll make you happy... it's what she would've wanted..." Raven looked at me, she took my face and turned it so I was looking at her, then she kissed me. She kissed me with all her love and what's left of her humanity. The kiss felt warm, unlike before, but she showed me that she still had what I feared she had lost the most...