It's Not Easy

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"It was nothing." 

"No, Stevie. It was something." 

She sets the fork down and looks at me. "He kissed me, I didn't expect him to do it."

"You definitely didn't stop him."

"I was taken by surprise, Lindsey!"

"The element of surprise was long gone when you finally pulled back."

"We do that after every show. We finish the song and we exchange kisses on the cheek and we say goodnight, but tonight he just went for my lips, I'm sorry it happened."

"Why did you let him linger that long? You liked it, didn't you?"

"My god, Lindsey... It was just a touch of lips, that's all." She's getting all flustered, drinking a big gulp of wine. "Certainly nothing like you were showing off in my dressing room."

"I'm sorry I missed you that much!"

"You wouldn't have kissed me like that if Don wasn't there too."

"How long has this been going on?"

"What has?"

"You and your lover."

"You have got to be fucking kidding me..."

"So, you're saying you're not sleeping with Don Henley?"

"No!"

"Then why did you let him kiss you?" I can't stop from yelling at this point.

"It shouldn't have happened, you're absolutely right, but I'm telling you again, I didn't think he would just pull something like that!"

"Oh, so, nothing has been happening between you and him for three weeks, but on the night I'm here, he decides it would be the best time to accidentally kiss you on the lips? What I think is that he was hoping I was somewhere around and he wanted to let me know you still want your fucking freedom!" The palm of Stevie's hand flies across my cheek and it hurts pretty bad, where does she find this strength in her, I will never know. I forget about my face and grab her by the shoulders. "Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?"

"Or what, you're going to kick me again?"

"I should be the one slapping cheeks, you don't get to do that after what you've been up to lately!"

"I haven't been doing anything! I AM NOT FUCKING DON FREAKING HENLEY! I'm not fucking anybody, not even you, since you apparently stopped wanting anything to do with me!" 

I laugh harshly in her face. "Right! Keep saying that, who knows, I might believe you if I heard it enough times!" It registers to me that my hands are definitely hurting her, gripping her shoulders like that, so I let go and cross my arms. "Hey, maybe Joe Walsh is around here too? I met one Eagle in your dressing room, I might as well bump into the second one on my way to the bedroom!" We were married at the time already when Stevie left for her Wild Heart tour, Joe was the special guest and I had to listen to all kinds of rumours about the two.

"Just get out!"

"So one of them could come in? Whose turn is it? Or do you enjoy having them both at once?" 

She pushes me with force that shouldn't be in that small body and I almost fall down. "Get the fuck out of here!" She screams and yanks the door open, showing me out. 

I stand for a few seconds, then march over to where she is, close the door and push her against it. She's absolutely stunning when she's boiling mad. Stevie wouldn't be herself if she didn't try and free herself, but she has nothing on me as I pin her hands above her head and attack her exposed neck and chest. When I go for the lips again, she hungrily kisses me back. I take her shirt off, that she changed into when we came back, and ease down her leggings too, which she quickly steps out of and I lift her up, her legs immediately going around my waist. My jeans drop to my ankles and I don't stop myself from thrusting up into her. She clings to my body like a leech, because I might not be able to hold her and also go as frantically as I am. Needless to say, this doesn't last much longer. I wrap my arms around her and hold tightly against me, feeling her rib cage rising and falling fast.

"I'm such an idiot... I'm so sorry." I repeat it over and over again, kissing everywhere I can reach. 

"I still want you out."

"Out of here or out of you?"

"Both."

"What?"

She breaks into a smile and shakes her head. "Kidding." 

"Don't do that!"

She touches my cheek, where her hand definitely had left a mark earlier, and presses a kiss to it. "And I'm sorry for hitting you."

"I deserved that."

"Linds, I love being... joined with you like that, but this is getting a little uncomfortable."

"Gee, I really am an idiot." I lower her down to the floor, pulling my jeans up while at it. 

She gathers her clothes, but doesn't put them on, making her way to the bedroom. I lean against the door frame, watching her getting into her nightwear.

"So... Am I allowed to stay?" Stevie pats the empty side of the bed and I walk over to it, getting completely naked and under the bed sheet. I lift my arm for her to cuddle up to my side and then put it around her shoulders in a much gentler way. "Tonight was eventful."

"You have to stop being this jealous, Lindsey." She's not beating around the bush.

"I love you so much, I see every man around you as a threat."

"You're not going to ever get rid of me, just deal with it."

I press my lips to her temple. "I would never try getting rid of you."

"You better not. You know I love you, Lindsey. Yes, what happened between Don and I was completely inappropriate, but I swear to you, I'm being honest, saying that nothing else is going on."

"Why was he in your dressing room?"

"He came in to say hi, that's all."

"I came in prepared to see you two having sex." 

"After everything you told me tonight? No way!"

I sigh and apologize again. "Believe me that I'm truly sorry, I just got angry and even if you were telling me the truth, I couldn't do anything but block it out and hear what I wanted to hear."

"That will get us nowhere."

"I know and please, Steph, I'm begging you to forgive me."

"Let's make sure this doesn't happen again."

"On both of our parts." I add, looking pointedly at her. She nods and kisses me. "Sleep?"

"Sleep." 

When I set my jealousy aside, I believe what she told me is true.