Dazai x reader one shots

Big Brother

You're probably wondering how I got in this situation: a little girl in my lap, eating ice cream. Not to mention I'm braiding her long (h/c) hair. Well let me tell you. It started at 7:30 am yesterday.

Kunikida and I enter the office to see everyone, including the president.
"I'm glad you two arrived safely. I was just informing the others of our new mission." The old man informs.
My blonde partner pushes up his glasses. "What is it president?"
"We have to save a little girl." Ranpo answers boredly.
"She has a portal ability. The enemy has been using her to rob banks all over Japan." Junnichiro adds. "Our intel says she's being abused. She's only six years old."
"Now the Port Mafia wants her. We can't have that." Atushi says affirmatively.
I nod in understanding. "What will happen to her after?" I ask, knowing the rookie would personally take her in if he had his way.
"Your friend with the glasses said they'd be taking her. I don't think we need my genius brain to deduce what they'll do with her." Ranpo responds.
I immediately look at the weretiger and see the reaction I knew he'd have. "Atsushi we can't take her in. She's only a child."
"I know but..." he trails off and everyone was silent.
"We don't have time to think about it. Let's find her and rescue her." The president orders.
Everyone gives a firm nod before beginning the search.

*6 hours later*

"Dazai you can't just rush in there. We need a plan." Kunikida scolds me.
"I'm not the one you need to worry about." I respond and watch as Atsushi uses his tiger legs to speed inside.
The blonde next to me groans in frustration.
I laugh softly, knowing full well that the boy would do that. I predicted all his actions from the moment I heard about the case details.
The boy sees himself in this girl and feels the need to save her.
I on the other hand couldn't care less. I don't even know what the girl looks like.
Oda popped into mind of course. Him and his damn orphans.

I follow Kunikida to where Atsushi ran off to.
"He's getting stronger." He comments and I agree.
"He's learning."
"Dazai, Kunikida, she's in there." Atsushi whispers panting softly.
"Good work." I pat his head and open the door.

My eyes widen upon seeing her.
Around her body are at least 50 portals.
She's just a little girl.
I look at the blonde but he growls and gets into a fighting stance. I follow his gaze to a large group of men in the right corner.
He glances at me for a moment then looks back at the men. "We need to make this quick."
"I'll get the girl. Atsushi help Kunikida."
"Right." The boy responds and immediately begins his attack.
I run around the left side against the wall and sneak over to the girl.

"Who are you?" She asks, obviously scared.
"I'm here to help you. We're gonna take you away from this bad place."
She looks around. "But that scary man will hurt you if you try to take me."
"I won't let him hurt me. I won't let him hurt you either. Ok? How about I get you some ice cream?"
"What's ice cream?" She asks confused.
The portals around us slowly disappear as I steal her attention.
"It's a really yummy desert that people eat on hot days." I respond.
It's clear what kind of childhood she's had, aka none.
What kid hasn't had ice cream at least once?!
"Come with me and my friends will get you ice cream ok?"

"Dazai we've dealt with the group now let's go." Kunikida informs, pushing up his glasses.
The girl clings to my leg as the two guys walk over.
"Are they gonna hurt me?" She asks.
"No. These are my friends. Mr. Kunikida and Mr. Atsushi." I rub her back and gesture to each guy as I introduce them.
"Nice to meet you. Now let's go." The blonde greets then turns.
Atsushi smiles and bends down to the girl's level. "Hello." He whispers gently.
"Are you the weretiger?" She asks.
So she knows him but not Kunikida or I.
They must've been hunting Atsushi while also robbing the banks.
"Yeah that's me. Do you wanna see my tiger form?"
She smiles and nods. "Yes please. It's so pretty."
"Later. Now let's go." The blonde man grumbles.
I pat her head and lead her out and to the car waiting.

Suddenly the car explodes and I quickly sheild the girl.
She screams in fright as she clutches into my leg. "He's gonna hurt you."
"That's not the man (Y/n). That is the Port Mafia." I respond and pick her up.
She buries her face in my neck and cries softly.
Atsushi frowns looking at the girl.
"We need to get out of here." Kunikida whispers and looks around.
"This way." I inform and quickly blend into the crowd that was forming from the explosion.
"Dazai come out and play." A familiar redhead calls from the sky.
"Damn," I whisper. "Let's go."

We manage to get back to the agency but (Y/n)'s grip get tighter.
"I don't want you to get hurt because of me."
"It's ok. We won't get hurt."
"That's right. I'll fix them up if they do though." The purple haired girl informs walking over.
"This is Akiko. She's a doctor."
"Hello sweetie. Why don't you let me bandage your scraps and you can take a nap ok?"
She looks at me, scared.
"She won't hurt you. We can get ice cream when you wake up ok?"
"And you can see my tiger form." Atsushi adds.
(Y/n) smiles and nods. "Ok." She holds Akiko's hand and follows her to the infirmary.
"At least she knows how to smile." Kunikida comments.
"She's so young. Will she really be safe with Mr. Ango?" The white haired boy asks.
"I don't know." I whisper and think about my old friend.

*Later*

That brings us to now.
(Y/n) smiles as she eats her ice cream. She had begged me to braid her hair.
Kunikida and Atsushi tag along and chuckle to themselves as they watch me.
I look at the girl behind the counter as a reference.
"Big brother can I stay with you?" The girl asks and I look at her quickly.
Brother?
"I think it would be best if you went with someone else. An old friend of mine."
Tears water her eyes. "But I don't wanna leave you. Do you not like me? Is it because I'm a burden?"
I look between her and the guys. "I don't think you're a burden. And it's not because I don't like you. I just don't want you to get hurt."
"But you can protect me right big brother? And I can make portals for you and your friends. I don't want the scary men to take me."
I groan softly and whisper. "I'm gonna regret this. Oda I blame you." I look at her and smile. "I'll talk to the president and see if I can keep you."
Of course the two next to me are surprised.
None of us expected it.
(Y/n) smiles happily. "I love you big brother." She hugs me tightly.
"How can a suicidal maniac take care of a little girl?" Kunikida questions pushing up his glasses.
"There were plenty of kids at the orphanage but none of them ever called me big brother. I'm jealous." Atsushi whispers.
I wipe cream off her cheek and pat her head. "Let's get you back upstairs ok?"
"Ok big brother." She wraps her arms around my neck and her little legs around my waist.
I carry her upstairs to the office and work things out with the president.
Of course he had rules and guidelines for us both to follow.
She agreed and hugged my leg.
I could tell the old man had a soft spot for children like her. I told him I'd help her with her ability. I'll be the best big brother.