What's Enough?

Chapter 139

*I'll be there in ten minutes-Jessica

I like her message, toss my phone on the bed, then go over to my closet rummaging through the clothes; I woke up late. Today is the first day back to school after the break, and we're already late.

She woke up late; when she called, I was also still asleep. She suggested that we skip school, I told her no, she asked me twice if I was sure, I replied twice, telling her, yes, and then we got off the phone to get ourselves ready.

I know she was concerned because of everything with Caleb. I'm partially over the Caleb thing; I miss him. Still, when I think about how he lied to me from the very beginning, how at first, it was all just a game to him, I no longer regret us being apart.

We should be apart; we were two broken souls trying to heal each other.

I thought we were going to be able to heal one another. However, we couldn't, he is still torn from his sister's death, and I am still broken from every fucking thing that has happened in my life.

We were doomed from the start; the past few days alone by myself has really helped me to see that.

I find my mom sitting with her back against the headboard, on her bed, "When is Dad coming back?" He left the very next day after the New Year's Eve Party.

"The end of the week, I think," she continues typing on her keys while looking at me. I always wanted to type without looking; I don't know how people do it. 

"Oh,"

"6 months!" she says like an announcement.

"Okay?" I say like a question,

"Six months and you will be a high school graduate,"

I put my head down, "Oh, right." Is it really only six months left?

She sighs, "I didn't want to bring this up, but college..."

"I'm applying to a few places today," I tell her, "Ms. Rodriguez called me yesterday and said that is what I will be doing at lunch, and if I don't finish, then we will work on it after school," That is after school at the diner, I couldn't get today off, so she is coming to me.

"After school? Do you need me to cancel your appointment with Rachel?"

"No, no, no," I say fast. "I'm going to go there first and then go back to the school; I should be back home around nine maybe,"

She smiles and then says, "Okay,"

A horn outside honks, it's Jessica, "I'll see you later, Bye."

...

While in the car, heading towards school, Jessica looks at me and then back at the road, "A brother, I still can't believe Ryder has a brother,"

"Mhm," when I first had told her two days after the party, she didn't believe me at all; I just knew she would have already known, being as though she and Ryder were friends. She said that she and Ryder weren't really friends friends until middle school; by that time, Jacob would have been long gone.

I didn't remember that she and Ryder weren't friends until middle until she told me.

In elementary, Ryder was mostly with Matt and Eric. Occasionally he would talk to me, then again, most of the time, he would talk to me, or at least try; I almost always tried to ignore the little boy that followed me everywhere. That is until our teacher made it a goal to partner us up in everything.

On-field trips, he was my traveling budding; we were literally either tied to each other or forced to hold hands the entire time. Then again, not forced, I remember perfectly everyone running away from their partners by the time we reached whatever trip we were on, but was I able to go off with my friends? No, because he dragged me everywhere with him.