Past, Present, No Future. (Harry Styles)

83. Messed Up

The music made him lose his head and act against the few small mouse instincts he was in position of...

I recited in my head as I listened to my music through the earphones placed in my head, because that's what the music is doing to me. Making me forget all the things I am expected to do, makes me forget the thing I am about to do.

Liam and I sat in his car taking the similar route to the prison we took the last time we were in Wolverhampton.

My brother and I usually would agree on everything; what to have for breakfast/lunch/dinner, what time to do our homework, what we'd be doing for the weekend; but that all ended in January of this year.

I should've noticed it at the start; we would disagree on my living situations, my uni plans, and...Harry.

"Come on Vanessa" Liam yanked me away from my thoughts and I noticed the barbed fences and usual depressed looking building outside the window.

I heard Liam unbuckle his seatbelt making me reach my hand up to me, "Wait, Li" I blurted trying to control my breathing.

Liam noticed this, taking the hand I had placed on his chest and holding it comfortingly.

"You can do this" I heard him say. "Hey, look at me" Liam shook my hand a bit.

I closed my eyes, opening them again to look at his, "Focus on my eyes" he told me, "You can do this"

I nodded, by breaths now back to normal.

I can do this.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and unlocked the door having Liam give me a proud smile.

The air outside was cold, just the way any British November air would be. I buttoned up my coat and stuck my hands in the pockets, trying to catch up to Liam where he walked farther in front of me.

We had to wait in the visiting room for a small while whilst they looked for our dad. As this was happened I was looking at the various posters they had scattered around the room about drugs and assualt.

One that was kind of hidden towards the ceiling caught my attention, it read about suicides in prisons. Suicides in general.

"Mr. Payne is ready for you two" the recptionist called to Liam and I.

I got up from where I sat in the chair, keeping my eyes on the suicide poster before being let inside.

We passed by various prisoners and their vistors, one of them had a little girl. She sat on her mum's lap as she talked to her dad through the telephone and looked at him through the window. The dad beamed at her, although being held away from her, he beamed.

A few more people more and we were sat in front of our father, or at least Liam was.

"What's wrong Nessie?" my father looked to where I stood, "Don't want to talk?"

I looked to him, a glare beginning to form.

Despereaux forgot all his fear. He only wanted to hear the music.

~ Harry's _ POV +

I wiped my wet hair away from my face as I walked over to where my phone lay on the bed, turning it on I had no notifications that needed to be checked. With a sigh, I tossed it back on the bed and looked for some clothes in my bags.

Throughout my entire shower I couldn't stop thinking about her; her eyes, her lips, the way she scrunches her nose when there's something she dislikes, or how she'd always push her hair out of her face even when she knows it'll only fall back over her eyes, or when she's concentrated with a pen in hand so she'll tap the pen against her cheek because she thinks putting it in her mouth is unsanitary but when she does it's because she's stressed.