Before you go... //h.s

Canyon moon

HARRY'S POV:
I'd finally got around to re-painting my chipped blue nail polish. I'd known for a few days what colour I'd wanted to paint them next but I just hadn't got around to doing it because I didn't own the colour I wanted, so it required a trip to the store.

I'd spent a happy few minutes browsing all the different shades, contemplating which one would be best. The cool air of the store and clean smell wafting up my nose as I looked. Especially in summer, the heat in LA could be unbearable and so seeking refugee in a air conditioned shop was the best I could do.

I know that shopping for nail varnish would definitely be considered a feminine thing to do, but honestly, I didn't give a fuck. People had always set these boundaries of what others should and shouldn't do and especially whilst I was in the band, our management had really strict rules about what we could do.

The constant rules and restrictions had frustrated me, I had never really understood all of it, like why jewellery and nail varnish was seen as for women only. So since I'd left the band, I'd begun not to care; the pas could photograph me if they wanted. My leap out of the boundaries had resulted in a lot of hate from some people. But others, they'd supported me and agreed with me.

Either way, I didn't really care what everyone else thought because I was doing it for me and those like me.

So this time, I'd painted my nails the perfect shade of yellow in honour of Iris; because she was always talking about her yellow, so I'd come to associate the colour with her. I'd spent a while perfecting my nails, making sure the polish covered the whole of each nail and after I'd waved them around for a few minutes until they'd dried, I checked them again.

They were perfect – exactly what I wanted except...something felt like it was missing. I bite my lip in frustration as I examined my nails and my collection of nail polish, hoping the missing piece would pop into my head. I was holding a bottle of black nail varnish when it came to me.

I should paint a smiley face over the top of each nail. I wanted Iris to smile more and maybe, somehow if I painted a smiley face on her colour, her star would see it and send smiles down in her direction.

Her smile was gorgeous, especially when she let go of her embarrassment and grinned wide with her teeth so her eyes crinkled at the corners.

I missed her already, and she'd only been gone a short while. The worst part was though, I had no idea when I would see her again... we had no plan between my hectic schedule and Iris' job in New York.

This was often why my relationships didn't work out: just because neither of us had time to see the other which was truly shit. It was one of the very few things I hated about my job, but Iris was different. I would literally drop everything to go and see her, I didn't care how many people it annoyed if I got to see her smile in person. If I got to hug her in person and feel her warmth  radiating into my skin.

Maybe I should go to New York soon.

But then again, I didn't want us to become one of those dependant, clingy couples that couldn't survive without the other. I wanted us to be strong individually and together.

Honestly, I'd never had a problem deciding stuff like this with girls before, but now my indecisiveness had taken over. Because Iris meant more than anyone before her and I absolutely could not fuck this up.

Sarah, Mitch and myself were gathered around the firepit out the back of my house as Mitch lay back in a beanbag lazily strumming his guitar as we threw ideas around for songs. We had tossed around loads of ideas, but the one I kept coming back to was the night under the rain and the moon that Iris had told me she loved me. The night that sounded like pure fiction unless you'd seen it, it would only really be believable to me and Iris.