Before you go... //h.s

Sign of the times

I was back at my own apartment, Maya's voice shouting at me from her room as we conferred on what to wear. Harry and I had gone down our separate ways since he was performing and so had to be early whilst I was in the audience so didn't need to be there for nearly two hours.

He'd kissed me properly before we left his apartment, relishing in each other and the fact there were no paparazzi around. The kiss had unfortunately wound us both up and now all I could think about was him.

Maya appeared in the doorway of my room, distracting me from my thoughts about Harry, gesturing down to her outfit.

'What do we think?'

'Love it,' I reassured, and she nodded with a slight frown, obviously not fully believing me. I sighed, Maya was not an insecure person but for some unknown reason, today she was being as indecisive as me over her outfit, 'Really Maya, you look great,'

'You don't look so bad yourself,' she raised an eyebrow and wiggled her fingers as she gestured for the tickets. Once I'd handed them over, she spun on her heel and practically skipped out the door. I was right behind her, it had been way too long since either of us had been to a concert simply because we couldn't afford it so this was going to be fun.

True to form, we were slightly late, and the band was already walking onto stage whilst the stadium cheered. Maya had no qualms as she elbowed her way through the crowds of people to the front of the barrier.

The crowded, sweaty bodies pushed tightly together under the dim lighting unsettled me slightly, but I shoved the feeling back, determined to just enjoy this evening.

I had heard Harry sing a hundred times, but it had always been soft humming to me alone. I was excited to see him really perform because I could already sense that he would be great – he had that natural charisma and stage presence almost like he was born to be a star.

'So that's what he looks like, I've never actually seen Mitch before,' Maya said, eyeing him with interest and I smirked.

'Him and Sarah are together so don't get any ideas,'

'I wasn't going to, I...' but she was cut off and even her loud voice was drowned as the crowd drowned her in cheers when Harry walked out. We joined in welcoming him on stage as I looked at his outfit appreciatively.

I know that many people had many opinions about some of Harry's outfits, but I loved them. I loved how he wasn't afraid to push boundaries and outright break them, I loved the individuality and creativity that went into his outfits.

Tonight, he was wearing a gold shimmering top with a bow at the top and a pair of simple, wide-legged black suit trousers. Yep, he looked incredible again.

His eyes flicked over the crowd, a genuine smile coming to his face and dimples carving into his cheeks as he realised how many people were there and that every single individual was there to listen to him.

The darkness of the majority of the venue made the spotlight on Harry even clearer and I could tell that he was ecstatic to be up on the stage performing again. For him, performing was not a boring part of the job but something he truly enjoyed, something he looked forward to.

'Hello,' his deep voice rasped through the mic and the crowd's screams increased again. He smirked slightly, looking down for a second before looking back up again and raising an eyebrow, 'How are we all doing tonight?'

He literally has the whole arena at his fingertips and he wears it like most people would wear a fucking hoodie. Casually, with ease.

Without a further pause, he glances to his band behind him and Mitch gives a nod back before they launched into to Kiwi. He was playing songs from his previous album in this concert because he obviously couldn't spoil the songs on his new album yet.

The new album which was yet to be named.

I'd spent a happy few hours listening to every song on his first album recently and it had only aided in helping me admire him more. He was so fucking talented both in his song writing and also in singing.

I loved Kiwi, I loved the bold lyrics and loud music. Every time I heard it though, there was a small twinge of insecurity whenever I heard it. I would never be as confident as the girl in this song even if I wished that I could get over my social anxiety and awkwardness.

Harry performing it looked so hot to be honest, his confidence radiating off him. A whole different persona seemed to take over him as he strutted around the stage singing and smirking. It only wound me up more and made me more desperate for us to be alone in his apartment again.

I'm having your baby, it's none of your business.

I'm having your baby, it's none of your business.

He sang as he ended the song with a final 'hey!' and Mitch slammed out a last chord on the guitar. Harry ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back with chipped nails which I only noticed now for the first time that were yellow.

The kind of yellow I was always talking to him about.

His eyes flickered over the crowd again, dipping down to scan the pit. His green irises took in each individual silhouette until they finally reached my own and when our gaze connected, a beam landed on both of our faces, his eyes lights up and glows with a joy I wish I could see more often.

I was the luckiest girl on the planet to be able to say I loved him and he loved me.

Harry went through three or four songs, like I said this wasn't really a concert so much as an event to get his name back out there before the release of his next album which is why he wasn't performing a whole set. Despite being a singer, his event seemed to only be half filled with singing; the other half being pure stand-up comedy from Harry's naturally amusing personality.

Every time he got the crowd to laugh or scream, that smirk came back onto his face as he let out a dimpled smile.

Once he'd placed where I was in the crowd, his eyes kept returning to me and his gaze made me so excited. I literally felt like a fan vying for his attention. His curly brown hair because more and more wild throughout the show as he danced around and ran his hand through it repeatedly.

The hair stylist must be screaming in frustration right now.

The show ended with Sign of the times and as the chorus came to an end and he dived into the last section of the song, his eyes turned to me again. This time it wasn't just a glance, it was a minute of him staring at me and only me whilst the rest of the stadium faded around us until it felt like it was only the two of us standing alone.

This song was golden poetry coming to life; I was witnessing pure talent in its finest arm form as I listened to his voice carry through the venue in such an angelic yet masculine tone.

Stop your crying baby,

It's a sign of the times,

We gotta get away

And with our gaze connected, uniting our hearts even when we couldn't physically touch each other I truly felt like the song was written for me.

Of course it wasn't, he hadn't even known my name when his first album was released but the lyrics rang so true for me. It really felt like words he'd told me before were being sung to me right now as he bared his soul to the crowd.

Stop your crying baby. He was right, I was always crying. Any little thing could set me off and sometime I even cried for no apparent reason. I didn't cry to be pathetic or for attention, sometimes I just couldn't help it: it all felt to much and spilled over the eyes, forcing it's way down my cheeks in the form of tiny water droplets.

It's a sign of the times. The crying was a sign of the times – it showed how I'd grown. How I'd left the good old days without realising and entered into a new phase of my life when anxiety had taken over. There was nothing more for me that showed I was no longer in the past than my crying.

We gotta get away. Getting away would be perfect – away from the paparazzi, away from the hate and death threats. Getting away sounded like the thing I wanted most in the world, it sounded like all my wishes fulfilled.

Thank you so much for reading! I appreciate it so much please please vote or comment <3
I have a question for you : are there any songs that remind you of this book? Just curious :)