Magnetism

8-beautifully brilliant

Everything hit me as I burst through the school door. A rush of cold air that brought out a shiver. Then the weight, the burden, of my emotions. My thoughts didn't slow, they darted from the desire to run to leave and never look back and then the confusion of the question that ran through my head: I knew his brother. But who was his brother? Being able to triangulate what exactly that was, that precise emotion, was an impossibility. And that too was overwhelming.

I looked around me, searching for familiarity but it was all familiar, too familiar. The same school I had gone to for years, the same surroundings I'd had for the same amount of time and the same atmosphere . Maybe that was the problem, I wanted something unfamiliar because there I felt like I needed to escape. The urge to scream teased me a little, to be heard and break down at what I had experienced but I didn't want that either - it was too familiar for me there.

Frantic energy surrounded me, I couldn't grip onto a single thought in my head. Then I saw her Ivy. Her face came into my view from behind me and I twisted round to see her. I studied her face, her pale defined face, in a way I hadn't before. Ivy had the habit of keeping a guarded expression up, not giving even a hint at herself away. But that wasn't what I saw then. Her eyes were large with concern and fixed on me. I could see the caution in her body language, in the way it held itself still like I would jump at any movement.

"Brooke" she said lowly "can I do something"

I blinked, a bit surprised I suppose. Ivy's question wasn't unreasonable, it was helpful really and gave me control. But I didn't know what I wanted, let alone if she could help with it.

"I don't know" I replied honestly

Ivy gave me a small smile "okay"

She stayed stood nearly a meter away from me, her patience was a quality I envied. Ivy just stood and waited like there was nothing else she could be doing.

But there was a lot she could have been doing, there was a lot I could have been doing. We had so much we could have being doing but we stood, as caught my breath and decided what I was going to next.

A minute passed and I looked at Ivy again.

"I wanna leave" I told her

"Okay, let's go"

Ivy walked up to me and extended her hand. It was warm as I pressed my own into it, the stark contrast almost jarring. We walked slowly to her car, Ivy lead me gently as if going to fast would break me in some way. But that's how felt, like I would break or fall apart.

I reached my hand out to open the door but before I even touched the car Ivy gently pushed it down and firmly opened it herself. Normally, that would have made me laugh or even roll my eyes but no, I did nothing but slip into the seat. When we were in car, I felt myself physically relax for the first time since - since it happened. I was still overly alert, and I couldn't rest my eyes but I could catch my breath, I could breathe without a weight on my chest.

Feilds and roads and houses blurred past the car window I looked out of. Neither me or Ivy decided to talk, we didn't need to. I knew she was there and that was good enough. I remember how everything seemed out of order to me, in the books I had read pathetic fallacy seemed to comfort the characters a great deal. Weather reflected the mood, letting them feel whatever they were feeling in the way they were supposed to and yet the sun still shone, the sky - although growing dimmer - was a vivid blue.

"How do you feel?" Ivy asked breaking the silence

I stopped for a moment, looked up at her. A million different ways to answer that question crossed my mind in a second. Truthfully, I wasn't entirely sure. Her hand slowly slid onto mine, not on my thigh like before but on my hand.