Magnetism

18 - Friday

A few days passed with nothing but school work and yet more school work. My mind was consumed with the stuff and it was only getting harder and harder. And so all my waking hours were filled with writing up notes, revision cards and mind maps. At home it was simple enough, as both my parents working hours seemed more manageable which meant less of Ella annoying me. However, at school it was much more difficult. As much as Ivy was a welcome distraction she was a distraction none the less. My eyes drew to her in a room, admiring her constantly. Rather frequently I'd have to take small sips of water to drag myself back into reality. Despite this, I was doing well in my classes, and was doing more then enough work. I think subconsciously I was doing so I was free on Friday like Ivy suggested though I will always tell anyone it was purely for my work ethic.
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Getting ready on Friday was a hassle, chaos surrounding everything that I did making the simplest tasks significantly harder. By the time I was out the door, my outfit was just black leggings and a thick cream jumper, my hair was down and my makeup not done. That walk to school carried with it anxiety, anxiety that pressed down on my chest. A weight of sorts. Reminding me that it was there.

I spent the day much like that, anxiety seeping out of me like radiation. It was only in my first free period that I realised the true tole it was having on me. My book was out on the table in front of me, I had highlighters at the ready and small sticky notes waiting to be used; I was stressfully annotated when a certain someone came in. Just as she'd done so many times, Ivy came in and walked over towards me, this was Ivy and very common practice if we both had an hour free. She came and plonked down next to me, originally just looking at the work spiralled infront of me.

"Did no one warn you how dense lit was as a subject?" Ivy asked with her amused tone

"Apparently not" I replied, not even bothering to look at her

She chuckled, and her felt her breath on my neck for a moments after, then the sound of her back hitting her plastic chair. Ivy was keeping me company in her own quiet way, a sort of silent support for the agonising school work. Still though, I had no choice and continued to go through the novel until I was 2 chapters further then I had covered that day. I still remember how particular I was about annotating, how I'd only use the smallest amounts if highlighter and be so carful with it making sure it didn't smudge, as if that would be that factor that meant I'd actually pass my A-level the following year, it was something Ivy often picked up on, including on that day as I was packing up. Her eyes glanced at my work, filling with a sort of astonishment. But I ignored it not wanting to start a conversation about my English class when I was so nearly done with it.

As I stood up, she looked me up and down before opening her arms. She looked cute sat there, all masculine looking with a subtle femininity, wearing her baggy black jeans and browny beige flannel with the largest warm caramel eyes looking up at me expectantly. I almost couldn't help but give into the tug that pulled us in closer. The one that compelled me to sit down, carefully, on her lap and allow the smell of vanilla and faint mens deodorant to come to my senses once again. Automatically, I felt the pressure as Ivy's arms wrapped round me, pulling me closer into her. A familiar feeling began to make its way through me again, one that both comforted and scared me, the feeling that right then and there in the moment was the safest place I could ever possibly be. It was a permanent refuge, only in my mind if nothing else.

Good things cannot last forever, and as frustrating as that might have been. After a couple more minutes of painful perfection, I shifted myself and got up from her. Her face attempted to hide disappointment, unsuccessfully, and so quickly I bent down close to Ivy. In an impulsive move, I pecked her lips then stood up straight grabbed my stuff and headed for the door. Just as I was about to leave I heard a