Tempted | Kai Parker

forty seven: watching

The sensation of strolling down the street I had grown up on never got any less strange since my father's passing.

It was like without him here, the whole place had become something totally different. Or perhaps it had always felt this way, and I was only now taking the time to stop and notice it.

The perfectly manicured lawns, which looked straight out of a catalogue next to the grass which had grown unruly in my own garden. The small crack in the sidewalk which I tripped over in first grade, achieving an inch long scar on my knee. And the soft snips of garden shears, chirping down the street.

How was it that something so familiar could feel so lonely?

The nosy neighbours only made me feel more secluded. Like they were one big group, and I was out on my own. Like I was just something for them to stare at, but not someone who truly belonged.

I constantly felt their googly eyes, which peered at me through gaps in neighbours' blinds – and heard their condolences which, when I focused, my vampire hearing could pick up even through thick windowpanes.

"That's Andrea." They'd point out. "She still looks at a loss without James."

I tried not to listen, but sometimes it was impossible not to hear the words which were never intended for my ears. Sometimes they'd be out in the garden and feel obliged to give you a nod of 'hello', with a crooked smile, which always seemed to bear a note of sympathy, no matter how natural they tried to appear.

Really, what it came down to was that every time I walked towards my house, I felt as though I was being analysed. I felt unable to feel or express every torturous emotion this street made me feel, wary of the eyes that were at all times - watching.

And the house - my house - it brought privacy, but it didn't bring peace. The relentless stares of neighbours stopped, but they were quickly replaced by ghostly stares from picture frames. By poignant pictures of the family that I no longer had.

Stares which were less real, but all the more haunting.

But today when I entered my house, for some reason, I didn't feel secluded from prying eyes.

I had quickly gone in to grab a few things to take to Kai's, but the moment I entered I noticed that the air seemed to sit too still. There was an unsettling atmosphere, which I could only describe as wrong.

With the first step I took down the hallway, I felt my head instinctively whipping around, almost expecting to see someone standing in a corner somewhere, with their eyes fixed on me. And with every pace I took towards my bedroom, I only seemed to feel more on edge.

By the time I was at the top of the stairs I felt goosebumps starting to creep over my arms, and I could've almost sworn I felt gentle breaths grazing the back of my neck.

I pulled a shaky breath through my lips as I pushed through the door into my room, telling myself I'd just very quickly grab what I needed and go. That I'd be back at Kai's in ten minutes, and I could just forget about all of this.

I tried to quell the panicked voice in my brain - to overrule it with a louder yell, telling me that I was being unreasonable. That I was, for whatever reason, being unnecessarily paranoid.

But as I dug in my dresser, I felt my heart rate get quicker and quicker, until I was sure the rapid thumps were going to shatter my ribs. My neck was beginning to ache from constantly craning to look over my shoulder, just feeling like something was behind me. And then I heard a little squeak echo from outside my room, a noise which I knew came from the fourth stair, which had always had a creak in it.