Death

Being Honest

Harry's POV
It's been 1 month and i'm officially broken withoute him am I really useless.
Gemma came over for a few days but I was to depressed to actually enjoy it.
My mom calls me everyday , she took a look at Niall and pity me.
Liam and Zayn try so hard to make me happy but I just can't even find the energie to even try. Louis and Audrey are so close and it's adorable , they tried to make good jokes so I would laugh and that's the only thing what worked for 10 seconds but after that I always fall in a dark hole again.
'Try atleast to be happy' Zayn said , I look at him angrily 'Not again' he mumbled.
I stand up , If this was a cartoon steam would come out of my ears 'Easy to said then done , telling someone like me to be happy is telling to a anorexic to eat! You don't understand it! You have Liam to hug , kiss and be with you I have no one , no one understands me like Niall does' I end my little speech with sobbing and I run outside.

Outside I break completely down in sobbing and crying.
It starts raining and I'm getting cold , I can't stop crying.
My heart pumps through my veins , I didn't eat for days but now i'm feeling it. My vision is blurry and blackspots start to form this is gonna the end of me I guess.

Niall's POV
Everyday I got a visit from Harry but today he didn't show up.
I want to know how he's doing the last time he cried because he can't go on without me. I miss him a lot.
'Niall' Liam said , I didn't hear him come in.
'Harry run away really upset because he felt offended by us' Liam said.
'He is missing now , we all searched everywhere I prayed he was here but he isn't I see' Liam said.
I need to search for him , I have to what if he does something he'll regret.
I try to open my eyes , it's so heavy but I have to I don't want to lose him.

The white light is blinding me but I can see Liam 'Liam help me out of this bed we are gonna search for my boyfriend' I said trying to get up , he looks up his eyes are red and puffy.
'Is this real?' Liam asked in shock , I slap his arm 'yes i'm real' I said well rolling my eyes.
Liam helps me to get off my bed and hugs me. 'I missed you never do that again' Liam said.
'We have to go and search for him' I said. 'Niall you just woke up , you can't-' I cut him off 'We are talking about my boyfriend here I don't give a fuck about my health on this moment okay!' I yelled.
'Okay okay' Liam said , we go outside.

'HARRY!' I yelled , looking around.
I see a dark alley and my stomach twists this the alley where I got beaten to shit. In the alley I see a body , Harry.
I run to it and sit down 'Haz! Wake-up' I shake his shoulders.
'C-c-cold' he mumbles , I take of my coat and put it around him.
I lift him up in bridalstyle , wow he's light. 'Harry did you lose weight?' I asked anxious. He didn't answer 'Liam let's go to your car' I said 'You found him!' Liam said .

I try to wake Harry up. My eyes fall on his wrists , white lines and red lines.
He cuts 'Is Harry a cutter?' I said out loud.

**FLASHBACK**
Please don't cut' his raspy and deep voice spoke , his eyes showed guilt and deep sadness 'I deserve it' I whispered.
'No don't say that nothing is your fault' he said is voice is pretty sexy... wait what did I fucking thought.
'It is , I could better stay in Mullingar there it was almost better than here now I feel like i'm already death' I said I sob and start crying again , I feel arms around me I put my head in Harry's chest. 'You can count on me Niall don't worry' He whispered in my ear.
I look him in the eyes 'Why do you care' I said my voice cracked.
'It's complicated , a long story one no one really knows they all know just a little part' He said sighing 'but I care about you and I want you to stop cutting it's bad' He said I smile for a moment He smiles back 'No I'm not gonna stop' his smile drops 'What?!' He said a bit to hard He looks at me guilty 'sorry a bit to hard' He said 'I'm not gonna stop I deserve this and nothing is gonna stop me' I said 'stop please , I can't take it if you are gonna cut also' He said.
***FLASHBACK ENDED***

That's why he said that he didn't want anyone else to cut too he does it himself. Tears trace down my cheeks.
'He told us in anger , i'm shocked I never knew' Liam said with a shaky voice. 'Mmmmph' Harry is moving.
'Hazza are you still cold' he shakes him head still closed eyes. 'do you want something?' I asked , he nods 'What do you want?' I asked with a awh face.
'Hug me' he mumbled , I smile bright and take him in my arms.
'Like this?' I asked , he nods and a little smile is formed on his lips.
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Ugh school tomorrow :(
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