For Your Love. {Damiano David}

Chapter Sixteen - Only.

Coming from the cold
Buried under heat
Lay you on the floor
Heavy like the force between us

Cut me like a rose
Turn me like a beast
Hold me on the floor
Heavy like the force between us.

I was only falling in love.

November 10th 2020.

11:35am

"Nonna!!" Alessia grins, taking off down the hall to the front door where Nonna had just arrived, being helped in by our dad. My little sister runs into her arms happily and receives kisses all over her face. She then glances up to see me walking out of the sitting room and smiles, holding her arms out to me. I quickly move into them, embracing her tightly. 
Nonna always had such a comforting smell. It was a complete mix of fresh fruit, freshly cooked bread and lavender, there was something so homely about it. I hear Damiano's footsteps from behind me so I pull away to let him get a hug from her. She looked so happy... for the first time in ages, like she was genuinely excited to home with all of us. 

"Lunch is on the table, I hope you're all hungry" I mention.

"Aw sweetheart you didn't have to do that! I was going to cook" My mum smiles at me sadly while hanging up her coat. 

"Don't be silly, I wanted to do. I've made soup and there's a bunch of sides to choose from" I tell them all. My Nonna leans forward and gives me a big kiss on the cheek.

"Grazie mia bella nipote" (Thank you my beautiful granddaughter)

After lunch.

"Thank you for that sweetheart, it was lovely" My dad wipes his mouth with a napkin, placing it into his completely empty bowl. 

"It's no problem... I'll just get these dishes washed up a..." I begin to stand up as my mother cuts me off.

"Oh no you will not. Your dad and I will be tidying up. You two are getting out of this house and having fun, I felt awful leaving you both with such responsibilities" 

"This family is so stubborn" I chuckle, shaking my head at her. "I'm not even going to be able to argue with you am I?"

"Not at all" She chuckles. I turn to my left side to look at Damiano who had just finished his lunch.

"So what do you wanna do on our day off?" 

"Anything... I don't mind" He smiles. "I could phone the guys, see if they want to go out?" He suggests which actually sounded like quite a nice idea. 

"Yeah, that sounds good. I'm gonna take a shower"

April 21st 2019.

"What are you doing?" I sigh tiredly, walking into the kitchen at one in the morning after hearing Dami rummaging about in the fridge.

"I see you left me no dinner" He mumbles agitatedly, slamming the fridge shut as he moves over to the other cupboards, looking for food. Yeah I didn't asshole. "Did you leave me any dinner at all?"

"I assumed you were eating out with the band" I fold my arms. That definitely pissed him off.

"Has it not occurred to you that there are two people living in this house?" He questions. He was drunk yet again, the stress of writing the album had him working late every single day and coming home every night drunk at unimaginable times. I mean I have work early in the mornings and it feels as if he doesn't have any respect for that at all.

"You know what Damiano, if you would just communicate with me maybe I could have made something for you. I didn't make you any dinner because you always eat out and you never actually tell me when you're coming home so when I do make you food, it goes fucking cold" I point out. He slams the cupboard door loudly.

"Why do you have to make everything so difficult?" He stares at me intently, leaning himself against the island.

"Oh I'm making everything difficult?" I spit. Was he serious right now? "It seems like I'm the one carrying all the weight while you're out all hours of the day doing whatever the fuck you want. I mean Victoria even told me that the last two nights you all haven't even been to the studio! You've been out partying Damiano so don't give me all that bullshit" 

"Excuse me?! I'm the one out there working to pay the rent of this fucking apartment while you study a waste of time drama course!" 

"Yeah and that's all you do! I pay all of our fucking bills, studying that seemingly 'waste of time course' while balancing a real job on top of that! You are out busking and making up meaningless lyrics calling it a career path!"  The words left my mouth without me even thinking, I did feel awful but I was too angry to even think about it. "Who takes care of this house? Me. Who washes all our clothes? Me. Who shops and buys all our groceries? Me. Not to mention I'm helping my Nonna every weekend. I mean I have all this pressure on me and the only thing you ever do for anybody is yourself!"

"Mamma mia... listen to yourself! You don't know the first thing about pressure. You don't know what it's like to have so many people counting on you to do your job and then come home to someone who is completely out of the loop of your lifestyle. I've done nothing but try to please you and everyone else for that matter so I'm sorry I seem rather tired of it, because I am!"

"On your days off you just sit in front of the tv and ignore me all day!  I've tried to be patient Damiano but I'm beginning to think you don't give a single shit about me, only your fucking music... and I am not going to compete with it"  I turn my back on him.

"Well I sure don't get any love from you!" He shouts. I turn back around quickly, pissed off he would even try to claim that was true. "The other day you watched me cry in front of you and you didn't give a single fuck"

"Because you were drunk AGAIN! You gave me a fake apology and then vomited all over the brand new carpet I had bought because you split wine on the last one!"  I yell. "You're so concerned about everything to do with yourself and the way people see you that don't give a shit about me who's waiting in our apartment for you every single night!" 

"SHUT UP!!" He screams, scaring me slightly. Man... he was pissed. "I'm sick of you! You disrespectful, ungrateful, selfish woman!!" He backs me against the wall, our faces inches apart.

"I am not selfish" I shake my head softly, my voice cracking in fear.

"How dare you say that to me!! You constantly nag me and you drain the life out of me! I'm tired of it!! If you can't respect me and I can't respect you, what the hells the point of this relationship?!" He asks me. That was the thing... I didn't know. The room goes silent and he steps away from me, pacing around the room. I couldn't bare to stay here another night because I knew it'd be the same damn thing. 

"I want out." I announce. "I need out of here for a while, we can't..  we can't be in the same space right now" 

"If you want out... that's fine with me. Go, take your fancy break while I stay here and hold the fort down" He spits, storming out of the room making sure to slam the door roughly behind him. 

.....

Hey guys! Thanks so much for reading.