Beyond Her Love

| • twenty-six • |

THE DESPERATE MAN

I jerked and got up from the chair frantically when the glass onto the dining table happened to shatter into pieces after it was dropped by Layla. 

What the actual hell is happening here? I'm not even aware of where I'm going through? Am I moving on or digging shits back again? James, you know that getting back with her is impossible. Why the hell do you re-analyze every shit you spent with her? 

I tried so hard to make myself hate her. But, as per my want and so does my mind. I really couldn't do that. Maybe it's more than love, I thought. Just all the moments I had with her managed to flash my mind and thump me badly. I could sense my mind regaining her voice like a whisper.

James...James...Jay...I'll come for you..

I'm almost near to halusinations I thought as I abruptly got up after warming the chair for an hour like sitting as a dumb and made my ways just to be met with,

'Ouchhh..' I got hurt by the prices of glass which just broke by Layla 

'Hey man, couldn't your optic nerves work the hell, don't you see we are cleaning up this mess?' I was kind of embarrassed as I was holding my phone in my right and the left one right beside my head scratching them in a gesture of being dumb.

'Oh, I'mmm-m..ah.. sorry. I didn't check it out,' 

'Go hang yourself in your own useless home. Why do you need a party here,' Well, if things goes beyond actually it shouldn't be, that would be the last straw.

'Shut the hell up, asshole,' I fist my fingers and directed towards his face to give a hard punch. Fortunately, Sienna arose. 

'Woah.. Woah.. Calm down, Lucas's calling you BTW,' She got me to the room with no humans out there and started up conversing.

'What's really wrong with you Jay, you really seem like you haven't had a good sleep for days. Things are okay?' I could feel her concern for me. But still I was not in the mood to blabber shits. 

'Yea, it is. Well, I've gotta go now, Mr. Lodge wants me to have diner with him, So let Lucas acknowledge. See ya,' I said and flew away from that annoying party. 

I fished out the keys out of my pocket. And, started driving much swiftly with my face sunk into the drops which managed to trickle from my eyes all over my face. I was literally so frantically managing to wipe my tears and drove the car simultaneously. 

This would be the most disgusting moment in my life, I thought to myself. Just what did I do? What was wrong with me? Why does God want to trick my life? I'm even so dumb that I've no clue if she has any feelings for me. Am I the only one who keeps hanging on to this shit? Is love a fiction??? 

As always I was so upset with things happening around. My life keeps going in the oath which I really could not guess. 

A few moments later, I finally managed to hit my home. I was weeping all night with holding pian as I really hate my life now. I just couldn't do anything on this goddamn life. I'm being still without any news on her. I dozed off quite minutes later, after precisely making myself worse than I was at the party, without having supper. 

As always the sun loves me more than anyone does, it decided to ascend the sky by erupting it's rays precisely on my eyelids.

I woke up after groaning and made my ways to get a bed coffee. I was exhausted in searching for the sugar for a quarter of a minute and plopped on the chair near the kitchen with my hands on face only to find the existence of sugar bottle right across me.