It's always been you

An entanglement, A misunderstanding, A lifetime of atonement

It doesn't matter if you exist for eternity or just for a fleeting moment.

We'll all gonna die. That's a dreadful fact we all can't escape.

But how you live the years of your life at your disposal... short or long it might be... that... that matters the most.

~~~

“You were supposed to be having dinner with us. But what time is it now?” Sam’s dad, Chih Tian admonished on the other line. “You’ve been roaming around the world for four years now. Haven’t you getting tired? How come you can’t get home before dinner even after your two months' absence in Taiwan?”

Sam Lin couldn’t help but smile. His dad was still and will always be the stage father that he is. During his travels, Tian constantly FaceTime him not to mention the daily emails and texts. 

“Shi Chih Tian, let the boy do what he please. He’ll be here, don’t make a fuss.” Sam could hear Ray, his Baba, interfere. He was always the voice of reason in the family ever since before. The calm and consistent one, his dad was the volatile and impulsive one.

They are a perfect pair. They started as friends then finally fell in love during the times both of them raise Sam. He owed a lot to these people. They’ve been his family ever since his mother died of childbirth and his real father, Lin Zi Hong also on the day he was born. So as an orphan, he was raised by Ray and Tian. His Uncle Evan and Richard were also hands-on when it comes to him during childhood. 

Overall he was raised by men all his life. They were his foundation and the family he will never cease to love and cherish. However, they are very secretive when it comes to his real father. Sam being Sam, he takes matters into his own hands and investigated anything related to Lin Zi Hong since he was a kid. 

This impulsive action of childhood was a testimony that curiosity can kill a cat. Yet he would never turn into someone who he was today without knowing what kind of a person his biological father truly is. 

His demeanor changes as he remembers everything he knows about him. His two dads never answer anything, even his uncles are no help also so all he knows are just facts base on the evidence he had derived all these years.

He learns he was a bastard son. Lin Zi Hong must be having an affair behind his boyfriend’s back which leads to the poor man committing suicide by jumping off a bridge. He hadn’t hated his father more than he did at that time that information was known by him. How could someone choose to cheat? 

Sam knows people make mistake and no one… absolutely no one is perfect, but he as a person never consider cheating as something acceptable. Not to mention if that deplorable action ended up killing someone in the process. 

Lin Zi Hong might not be the one who pushed his ex-boyfriend on that bridge, yet he was still the major reason why he had chosen to go ahead and kill himself. After learning, his father's dark secret he finally understands why his adoptive fathers and uncles are so adamant not to spill anything. So Sam takes it on himself to atone for those sins. 

He knows he couldn’t bring back that man’s life nor he could change anything. All he can do is to turn himself into a better person and offer his abilities and knowledge to help those who are suicidal and meant to harm themselves.