Our indelible pasts|✔

forty five - bryson

THIS HOUSE IS gigantic. I've gotten lost at least five times today and Noah, Kiana and Nia are nowhere to be seen so that doesn't help my case here. They're the only ones of us that actually know this place.

Earlier, I somehow found myself in Kiana's dad's office. When I opened the door, there were about five people staring back at me, wondering whose child just interrupted their meeting. After that incident, I made my way back to my room and decided to just stay put. No need for further embarrassment.

Tonight is the dinner, so I'm assuming that today is Kiana's sister's death anniversary. I think everyone figured as much and so interaction has been very minimal today. It's honestly very awkward here, knowing what today is about and having this feeling that you really shouldn't be here. I think we all feel that way. Like we're intruding into a very personal matter that we have no business being in–no, not like, we are intruding.

At breakfast a couple of hours ago, everyone but the twins and Kiana were downstairs. And as we plated our food, Kiana's mom was the star of the moment. At eleven in the morning, she was already high. I could smell the weed on her from quite the distance–it's like she bathed in it–and even if I couldn't, her red sunken eyes and weird energy sold it already.

"I'm so happy you guys made it. Today is such a hard day, you know?" Kiana's mom had said when she found us all downstairs.

As stoned as she was, her emotions were a mess. She was crying one second then the next she was propelling back to the kitchen to get some more food, as giddy as a child.

So yes, it's been a weird day so far. And I wouldn't be surprised if it only got weirder at the dinner.

With nothing better to do, I lie back down on the bed and call Sandra's phone. There's no one else that can make today more bearable.

"Hey baby." Sandra chimes excitedly when she picks up after the second ring, instantly bringing a smile to my face.