(Warning!- I write these late at night and I do not proof read them)
"B-breakfast..?" I say
He nods he head and smiled at me, he looked proud of his cooking. I'm sad that I won't be able to keep it down and waste all his hard work.
Slowly, I reach out and grab the plate along with the utensils. And slowly take a bite of the eggs, before I could even chew I hear Tubbo say: "do you like them??" His tone of voice made me smile.
"Yes, It's very good! Thank you for making it." I say in my happy voice.
"Good, now that you had your resting day, I was planing on going to the beach-" he gestures to the window.
"But it seems to be raining today and because of covid we can't really go anywhere because it will be to busy" Tubbo sighs I finish my eggs and move onto eating the toast. "SO! instead of doing anything today, we are going to be filming a vlog with Tommy tomorrow!" He says happily- fuck a vlog.. after my face got leaked. I need to stop being a baby and suck it up. "Sounds good" I say with my mouth full of toast, "so what are you planing on doing today?" I say to Tubbo,
"Uh... I thought maybe I'd go live for a bit! If you don't want me to though-" I cut him off.
"Nono, you can stream today, I don't mind." I really don't want him to, but I know he really wants to so I guess I'll let him.
Tubbo's face lights up, "really?!" He said s a bit louder then I expect so I tense up- he noticed this and muttered a quick "sorry" before getting up and leaving. The minute he closed the door I got up to 'get rid' of all the food he just forced me to eat. Well I shouldn't say forced, he was just looking out for me out of pity.
I get to washroom and close the door, making sure to lock it. I need down by the toilet and take a deep breath, I do this almost every time I eat so I don't know why I'm not used to.
I stick two of my fingers down my throat, activating my gag reflex. And repeating that until I finally throw up, I do it again to make sure there is nothing left then gasp for breath. It was done, all Tubbo's hard work down the drain or down the toilet to be more accurate.
I slowly get up then sit right back down. My head was killing me, and I was so so fucking dizzy.
I need to fucking suck it up, people have it way worse then I do. I get up quicker this time and flush the toilet, then walk over to the sink to brush my teeth. I hated the taste vomit left and this case my breath wouldn't smell like it to.
I finish that up and put the toothbrush back into its holder along with the toothpaste. And before I leave the bathroom, I splash my face with cold water so it isn't so red and puffy.
I unlock the door and open it, before I'm even two steps out the door I have to lean against the wall, I'm seeing stars, everything is spinning and my legs felt weak and suddenly everything went black.
Tubbo's POV:
After I left the room I made sure to listen carefully, I have to figure out every before I ask him what's going on.
I'm glad I didn't just go outside because I heard him get up and walk over to the..washroom. I could tell by the way door sounded when he shut it. I quietly make me way back into the main room and over the the washroom.
That's when I heard it, the sound of gagging then vomiting, and then the same thing over again. Fuck.
I walk out of the room, not bothering to stop him because I knew that the door was locked and if I did he would probably have a panic attack then use the razor 'for crafts' to cut himself in order to calm down.
I take out my phone, and open my notes app- and add to my notes about Ranboo's mental health.
'He doesn't seem to want to eat even when forced to he will throw it up if you try to make him eat.
Lock all the bathroom door next time you make him eat.'
Short and to the point, I don't even know why I'm writing it down anymore, it's not like I'm going to forget it. But just in case something happens at least I can prove I tried to help.
Ranboo's POV:
I wake up on the floor, hopefully it hadn't been to long since I passed out. Just walk it off, you'll be fine.
I get up without caring about the dizziness and walk over into the kitchen to get some water,
"Hi boss man" Tubbo says before looking back at his phone. He seemed to be texting someone.
I fill up a glass with water and drink it all in about 3 seconds. My stomach felt way better then before so I was happy about that.
"Hey imma go stream now ok..?" Tubbo says looking at me
"Ok, I might go on a walk to explore" I say back not caring enough to say anything else.
"Just don't get lost- this place is very hard to navigate." Tubbo says before walking away to his set up.
I get on my shoes and head outside. It was nice to be out of the house and to finally let down my mask.
I walk around without really paying attention until I stumbled across a park, it was one of the parks that had a nice garden attached to it. I don't know how I got hear but I don't care. It was to pretty for me to just walk past it.
I walk over to the garden and look at it, it seemed to be all roses. But they were all different colours! Some of which I have never seen before, including this nice bright red rose with white stripes all over it. I look around the park to see if anyone else was there, which there wasn't! I take the razor out of my pocket and cut the rose off the plant.
I pocket the blade once more and smile at the rose, I think Tubbo might like this. (In a platonic way)
I go to head back home when I realize it's been over 3 hours and I have no idea where I am.
I sigh and grab my phone to call Tubbo, he's streaming so I think this will be a funny way for him to end stream. I'm still a bit panicked though. I click the call button- and he picks up.
"IM STREAMING!" he screams into the mic, making me flinch and almost drop my phone.
"I knoww- Tubbooooo" I say making my words draw out.
"What did you do-" Tubbo seems worried now. Oops
"I got lost- can you come find me pleaseee" I say in a sad-ish tone.
I hear I sigh and then a
"I told you not to get lost- But fine, I'll come and pick you up." Tubbo says
"Thank you I'll share my location now" I say as I click the share my location-
"HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU THAT FAR- never mind- give me 15 minutes I'll be there k?"
"Ok" I hang up. Looking around once more I see a bench!
I sit down and wait for Tubbo to arrive.
He got here, but it did take a half a hour- I get into the car and we drive home.
Once we arrive back I remember about the rose! "Tubbo here- look what I found well I was out!" I pulled it out of my pocket and hand it to him
"Ooo! It's so pretty! Where did you- you stole it from the park didn't you." Tubbo says
"Yep! Do you like it?"
"Yes Ranboo, thank you!" He smiles and heads inside the house.
I smile and follow him, it's not that late but my sleep schedule is already fucked so I'm tired.
Tubbo and I stay up for about 3 hours watching tv until he falls asleep. I slowly lift him up and place him in his bed, them head back down turn off the tv and curl up. For the first time in awhile I feel completely calm.
I wish I could stay here forever.
A/N
Remember that you matter! It might not feel like it will never get better but I promise it will!
Remember to drink water and eat a little snack you deserve it <3
I'm excited to write the next chapter have a good day/night!
Word count: 1479
YOU ARE READING
Words hurt ||Ranboo angst||
Random*WARNING THERE ARE SPELLING ERRORS, so SUCK IT UP.* Ranboo has a hard time dealing with his emotions, and often puts others before himself, he develops unhealthy coping mechanisms early on in his childhood, and his life starts to seem meaningless...
