(Warning!- I write these late at night and I do not proof read them! This one was really late so it might just be gibberish)
No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no nO NO NO NO NO NO NO!
THEY CANT KNOW!
"Please-." I sob out.. "I can't fail.. please just let go!" I scream again this time kicking his leg..
I don't care if it's techno I DONT CARE.
I JUST CANT FAIL AGAIN.. "Boo calm down, I'm not letting go of you.." I hear his calm voice say.
It's not ok. It will never be ok, I don't want to live don't fucking save me please?!
"Please-..! I-i can't.. don't make me-.. st-ay!" I yell back at him, my voice breaking as I hold back more sobs.
"No boo.. Your staying here." He says back to me.
So I just start screaming, I was so fucking angry at everything and everyone.. if saved me it would be a fucking repeat of last time. He saves me, dad makes a Amber alert, the police come and escort me back to my house..Then dad will just go harder on me.
"Techno please.. Let me, it will be worse if you don't.." my voice was raspy from all the yelling, "i dont want to be alive.. don't make me stay.." I beg.
Please listen to me..
"It's ok boo, I'm not letting you go.. I'll bring you to my house, we'll fix you up and then we'll drop you back off at your
house ok..? your going to be ok, things are going to get better I promise." He replies.
"I DONT WANT THINGS TO GET BETTER! LET ME FUCKING GO!" I screamed.. my throat was raw.. everything hurt. And just all this struggling was opening up some of the cuts.. maybe if I bleed more he'll let go.
As soon as that thought crossed my mind I start to claw at my wrists, making them nothing but raw.
Techno did seem shocked, but he didn't loosen his grip at all. In fact I might have just fucking made it easier for him.
The dizziness hits me once again, this familiar feeling of losing control, the one thing I had left was slowly stripped away from me. And from my own stupid actions to, my vision starts to go black, i try to call out for someone, something that could help me. But nothing it was just black. Just nothing... just emptiness
technos POV:
What. The. Fuck.
I didn't expect this. I expected to find him on the floor? I don't know, but holy shit.. that was fucking perfect timing, I wasn't here he would be gone. I would have lost him and I wouldn't have even known, but now I have a limp 17 year old in my hands, that just begged me to let go of him, heck I had to hold back tears when he said he didn't want it to get better!
I slowly carry him over to my car, it isn't that far and plus he was really really skinny.. like it was going to kill him if he didn't eat..
I carefully open my car door and place him in it, he won't be at my house for long so he won't really need anything right..? I grab the first aid kit and open it to grab some disinfectant and some bandages, I grab his arm gingerly making sure not to make anything worse, and I roll up his sleeve.
I stood there in shock. It looked so much worse in person, you could tell how much he wanted to die to say the least.
His arm was completely covered in deep cuts, even some on the back of his arm. I grab my phone and take a picture to send to Phil, he needs to see this right..?
I put my phone back in my pocket and start disinfecting the wounds being really carful not to open then yet again.
I don't bother to check the other arm since he showed me it the other day, it was fine and had nothing but small whit lines.
I get into the driver seat of my car and start it up, getting ready to start the long journey back home, I just wonder how long this has been going on for, how long he's been suffering by himself..
Something must have driven him to the edge of that bridge... I just need to figure out what..
Maybe it was leaving the uk..? I mean he did leave a lot earlier then planned so maybe that's why, or maybe it was his mental health collapsing on him causing him to want death.. or maybe it was his father? No he seems like a ok man.
He hasn't done anything bad to his son as far as I know, he said that boo likes to lie to get attention, so I'll remember that, but he also said to leave him be sometimes. Odd. Anyways if he had anything wrong what would it be..
Ranboos POV:
I wake up in a moving vehicle, my head was killing me.. why couldn't I just fucking jump.. And how did I end up here.. I go to move and stop almost instantly, my arms felt restrained. I roll up my sleeve to find my masterpiece covered up with bandages, it smelled of cleaning shit. I hated that smell, it reminded me of worse things that father has done to me. But it's fine, I deserved it right? As dad once told me, everything I think about him is only in my head, and that he's never done anything wrong.
He also told me that everything he's doing to me is normal for every kid, and that your just support to deal with it, and that I'm a pussy for not being able to. Thinking about it now maybe he was right, that's probably why techno is going to bring me back there, because I need to not be such a pussy.
"Oh your awake..?" I hear techno say.
I mumble a quick "yes" that's it.
So..
"What made you almost kill yourself."
A/n
Hello! :D
Super late chapter so please go to bed! Also, my comment section isn't a place to rant about how much you want to die, if you ever feel alone just dm me! :D I'll always be here to help!
Word count: 1103
YOU ARE READING
Words hurt ||Ranboo angst||
Random*WARNING THERE ARE SPELLING ERRORS, so SUCK IT UP.* Ranboo has a hard time dealing with his emotions, and often puts others before himself, he develops unhealthy coping mechanisms early on in his childhood, and his life starts to seem meaningless...
