(Warning!- I write these late at night and I do not proof read them! i might re read this after and correct this but idk-)
Ranboos pov:
I walk out of the washroom after putting my clothes on, i decide on wrapping my arms back up when i get away from the mirror. i mean looking at myself already gives me a panic attack, let alone sitting in front of it the whole time i'm bandaging up my arms. my sleeves were rolled up as to not get any blood on the clothes, and i grab my blade.
i unlock the door, then walk out. i didn't expect techno to be standing a couple feet from me, i just froze i mean if i had bandaged my wounds would he have noticed? probably not, but then again i am holding a razor blade. i feel the tears pool into my eyes i didn't want to cry but it seems i can't hold it in this time. "Ranboo what the fuck did you do.." i hear techno says a stern voice, this pushed to the point of a panic attack. isn't that fun right???
i back up to the wall and slide down, my legs not being able to hold my fat ass. i see the blurry figure slowly come towards me, i fling my arms up and start mumbling , I grab my blade making sure to wield it like a weapon, if he hurts me i'll hurt him. i feel arms wrap around my stomach, try to scramble out he's going to try to hurt me fuck fuck..!
"STOP PLEASE, IM SORRY" I scream at the blurry figure
Why did this have to happen, how could I have been so fucking stupid.
"plea-se don't hurt me, please don't hurt me techno.. I'm sorry I'll go away please-! I'm sorry- I'll l-leave I swear- I'll be out-t of your way" I say in a panicked voice
I'm able to see now, the tears have gone. He's.. hugging me? Why I don't fucking deserve a hug. He's just trying to build up my trust don't tell him anyth- but I want to! I trust him, and he won't hurt me right? Right..? Please don't fucking hurt me..
"Boo calm down.. I'm right here, take your time." I hear him say quietly, he seems to be treating me like I'm glass that will shatter at any second.
I mean he's not wrong though.. "s-sorry.." I managed to stutter out, fuck will he hate me for that-
"No need to apologize boo, just please tell me why.. I just want to help you." Techno says, still clinging onto me like I'll break if he lets go.
"I-it's nothing techno, it's just what every only child has to go through.." I mumble back, he's a only child so he'll understand that it's normal, but then he'll hate me for breaking the rule of 'not talking to others" about it.
"What do you mean by that Ranboo." Techno says in a confused voice.
He.. doesn't know..?
Wait he probably does, maybe he doesn't remember it because it's normal-! Right?
"Well, your a only child right?" I ask. Techno nods, so I continue on.
"Did your father not, you k-now? Let out his anger on you, or like helped him out with other things.. He told me that this was a normal thing for only children to- uh go though.. so I.. I thought.. techno?" I stop my self when I see technos face drop, it was a angry expression. FUCK I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO DAD, EVERYONE GETS MAD IF YOU TELL THEM. FUCK FUCK FUCK!
I push techno off of me and curl up into a ball again, I fucked up. This is my fault, I deserve what ever is going to happen to me, I start subconsciously scratching my wrists. Maybe that will help distract me.
I feel a tap on my shoulder and this is it, I fucked up.
My breathing gets quicker and my hands shake, at least I tried my best to be friends with him right?
He will send me back to my dads no matter what now, just because I couldn't handle the fucking normal things he did to me. This is all because I wasn't careful, god damit why didn't he let me die. I tightened my grip on my razor blades the feeling of the sharp pain help out a bit, till I felt my hand forced open and my only coping mechanism pulled away from me.
I open my eyes to see techno standing up over me, I FUCKED UP WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO?!IMDONT WANT TO GET THROWN AGAINST A WALL AGAIN.. WAS HE GOING TO DO THE SAME THINGS TO ME AS MY FATHER DID!?
"IM SORRY, PLEASE I DIDNT MEAN TO TELL YIU I JUST EANTED TO KNOW OF IT WAS REALLY NORMAL I KNOW IM NOT SUPPOSED TO TALK ABOUT IT!! AHA YOU KNOW HOW IT IS TIGHT TECHNO? WE ARE FRIEND RIGHT? PLEASE DONT HURT ME.. PLEase..? Please.." I scream at him
Shit, I fucking yelled now I'm really going to get it..
maybe I can run out of here and die before he can kill me himself?
"ᴮᵒᵒ-? Cal ᵐ down?" I hear in the distance . But it's to late to pull me out of this, he's going to get me to calm down then strike.. he'll hurt me, and make my friends hate me.. not like they already do.
I mean who wouldn't hate me, then know that I cut myself and everything. Even my dad said it was just for attention! maybe it was just for attention- am I that worthless that I need attention 24/7?! Is this all for attention..?
I just want to be happy.. that's it..
My brain feels foggy and my breathing won't calm down, I take one last attempt at protecting my head so I don't end up paralyzed and let the fog consume me.. before it does I hear one last thing..
"Ranboo.. I'm sorry but it's not normal.."
A/N
H E L L O ! :D
hope your all having a good day, and thank you for almost 20k reads! The support has been in real and has really help me though this rough spot in my life, I hope you all have get some water, and make a little snackie for yourself, you deserve it<3
Anyways remember, my comments aren't a place to vent, but if you ever need anything that my dm's are always open to.
If you have any suggestions please dm me, my discord is Boo~#8477 !
Have a lovely day darlings!
Word count! 1123 :)
YOU ARE READING
Words hurt ||Ranboo angst||
Random*WARNING THERE ARE SPELLING ERRORS, so SUCK IT UP.* Ranboo has a hard time dealing with his emotions, and often puts others before himself, he develops unhealthy coping mechanisms early on in his childhood, and his life starts to seem meaningless...
