Little One ∞ George Russell

∞ | Epilogue

♪
Jessie J - Flashlight:
'I got all I need when I got you and I, I look around me and see a sweet life. I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight, you're getting me, getting me through the night. Kick start my heart when you shine it in my eyes, can't lie, it's a sweet life. Stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight, you're getting me, getting me, through the night'

J u l y  4 t h  2 0 2 2:
"Are you sure?" Fiona asked, looking up at her fiance George's face. They were standing in the bathroom and in her hand was the strip of birth control pills she was supposed to take this month. "Yeah, I think it's the right time. We've known each other for a year and a half, we've been living together for over a year and got engaged a few months ago. Everything is going great, so why not?" George responded while Fiona looked at the ring that was added to her finger earlier that year, finally completing the set. George's gaze was locked on the prescription in Fiona's hands, which she had been holding for the last half hour. "And by the way, it's not as if we'll be actively trying. We're just not preventing it from happening anymore.." He added, which made Fiona feel so much better about their decision.

Before she could think about it for a second longer, she threw the strip into the trash can and with that, she opened her mind to a future with a little baby. They were both 24 years old, George had started his first season with Mercedes and was doing amazing while Fiona got a promotion to hospitality coordinator after Eleanor left, so the future looked bright for the both of them. They knew it wasn't going to be easy to conceive and as George said, they weren't actively trying but the possibility was there now and as scary as it was, it felt quite liberating at the same time.

Fiona looked at herself in the bathroom mirror after George went back downstairs and took a deep breath. Her medication seemed to work really well, her periods weren't nearly as painful as they used to be and at her check-up a few months ago the gynaecologist had said that everything looked perfectly healthy. "You can do it, Fi". She said to herself, encouraging words that had a double meaning. She made herself believe that it was possible to have children, but that she was also able to handle it if it didn't turn out how they wanted it to.

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S e p t e m b e r  2 9 t h  2 0 2 2:
"Okay.." Fiona placed her phone on the bathroom counter like she had done two times before. She started recording before she slowly opened the plastic around the pregnancy test. Her nerves were through the roof and although it was only the third month off birth control, it felt like she had done this a million times already. They were in Russia for the race in Sochi this weekend but Fiona couldn't wait a few days to test at home after they would come back. Her hands were shaking when she peed on the stick and placed it back in the wrapper to cover the little window.

She had recorded all three tests she had done until now, but she figured the first one would have been too soon seeing her body probably needed to adjust after going off birth control and the second was just negative. "Third times is the charm". She kept telling herself and she was thinking of all the fun ways to tell George if it would be positive. She wanted to surprise him in a fun way to make sure they would remember the moment forever. He was a little more hesitant when it came to doing the tests, so Fiona decided to take them by herself so she wouldn't bother him with it too much. She knew she could be quite full-on when it came to that stuff.

The time seemed to be crawling by and Fiona almost squealed when the timer on her phone finally went off. She took a deep breath and shook her hands a few times to try and get rid of her sweaty palms before she stepped towards the counter. She slowly grabbed the wrapper and slid the test out, taking her time before she turned it around. It was negative. Fiona felt her heart drop and a lump formed in her throat immediately. She stopped the recording and sat down on the toilet, feeling a tear fall down her face. Another month of no success.