We've all been here.

Reality

Let's turn now from the ideology that plays in the culture wars to the lies we believe about ourselves. Most of the lies we face don't make news headlines or end up in Twitter debates. 

It's the kid whose turning into an adult who was berated by his father and comes to believe I am only as good as I am successful at work.

It's the teenager who, comparing himself to the mirage of Instagram, comes to believe I am ugly and unworthy of love.

It's the kid who was raised by an angry perfectionist mother and years later still believes I have to be perfect to have peace. 

The kid who believed that he is nothing without high grades, and now looks back and sees his mistakes and lives a life of regret and constant pain of needing to improve.

The kid who grew up not being able to understand himself, and whenever he found happiness, he always pushed it away. Now he believes that if he can't figure himself out, then there's no way no one else has. 

Facing the lies we have come to believe can be terrifying. As T.S. Elliot put it, "Humankind cannot bear very much reality." The illusions we cling to become part of our identity and, with it, our security. They make us feel safe even as they imprison us in fear. Ripping them out of the humus of our soul can be excruciating. Let's get more personal. I used to believe just because I was berated by my dad and and came to believe that I am only as good as I am successful at work dosen't mean it's true. Just because I believe I am ugly and unworthy of love dosen't mean to say it's true. Just because I think I need to be perfect to have peace dosen't mean it's true. Just because I believe I need high grades to be something dosen't means it's true. Just because I can't understand myself dosen't mean God dosen't want to help/understand me.

TRUTH IS NOT RELATIVE. That phrase is just lies. These are not based on facts, these are based on truth. One of the lies I used to believe is that "reality is harsh, deal with it." The truth is that God is there. The truth is that emotional wounds can be healed and patched up, not through things, people, therapy, the words I say, but through God. I've come to realize the reality is what the Bible says.

When Jesus said, "You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free" (John 8:32), he was simultaneously saying that we're enslaved by lies. We're in bondage to the tyranny of false ideas about reality that hold our souls and our society in captivity to suffering and pain. As Paul later said, the devil has "taken [us] captive to do his will" (2 Timothy 2:26).