Infatuated with a God

Chapter Sixty-Seven

It wasn't often I found myself unable to name the emotions I felt. Usually, it was either anger, sadness or contentment, and I was comfortable with it remaining that way. But right now, I found myself feeling both too many things and nothing at the same time. Partly, it was due to the little time I had to comprehend my situation. Still, I tried my best on the journey to the charity ball to figure out exactly what to do about everything. When my watch turned on I was hit with many notifications, several missed calls from Tony, and a few name alerts hitting from my name. I was all over the news. We had all expected some level of coverage, as I mostly kept to myself in the compound. Tony and Steve were the two public figures for the most part. It was comfortable that way. But this level of publicity meant that the news would run stories on it. Especially with Loki by my side. Which turned out to be a large part of the problem. The news was mostly split. Several channels ran with the hospital story which put us in a good light. It helped to offset the more negative coverage of our time here. That was the news. It should have remained on those stories. The seventeen children who were now able to recover. The millions donated by the Avengers to rescue and relief fund. The few channels that stayed on that mission were probably told to, I didn't doubt that Tony owned them in some capacity. The ones that didn't, well it didn't paint us in a good light. Didn't paint me in a good light.

The story being run was of me. An immigrant who was dangerous and erratic. And the relationship I had with Loki. They had so little to run from, but they milked it for all it was worth. A smile and a laugh as I left the car to the hotel, the way Loki utilised my magic, and then the rumours of dinner just outside of the city. A photo taken by one of the guests as I reached out to comfort Loki was circulating as well. The news didn't take too favourably to the idea. A woman going after two brothers was one story, Loki using me to gain the Avengers' favour was another. It was spiralling badly, and Tony couldn't stop it. The only relief I had was that they didn't believe the story. What was worse was that it was closer to the truth than they realised. We were in some type of relationship, however complicated it was. This just proved how badly it would go down in the public if it ever leaked. Mostly I just felt... tired. Loki was making it worse. He put his shields up, completely shutting me out. Moreover, he seemed guilty, and I couldn't tell why. I was too exhausted to pry as well. It had been suggested that we don't go to the ball, us being seen together would only fuel the flames. But us not showing would be as good as an admission of guilt. So, the entire car ride I prepared to make a small speech because ignoring the reporters would not help either. Over time my anxiety began to take over and I resorted to playing with the sleeve of my dress to calm myself.

We were five minutes away when Loki's hand came out to stop mine.

"You are going to fray the fabric if you don't calm down, elskan." I let out a deep sigh before threading my fingers through his.

"This couldn't have gone worse." For a second, Loki's face screwed up slightly in pain before his mask fell on perfectly. "Would you please tell me what is bothering you, Loki? I can't deal with you shutting me out as well." It was his turn to sigh, his fingers unwrapping from my hand before he retreated as far away as the car would allow him to go. He stared out of the window as he talked, his shields surrounding us so the driver couldn't hear us, not that she was listening to begin with.

"If you had spent the entire journey with someone upset because the world thought they liked you, would you be happy about it? What is worse is that the news isn't wrong. We are fucking. So, your reaction isn't exactly justified either. Is it that much of a problem for the world to know you are mine?" Like usual he didn't seem to understand the situation I was put in. More than that though, he shouldn't be this blasé about it either. But, of course, his reputation wasn't on the line. It didn't really bother him if the world thought him evil or not because he had spent a long time cultivating such an image. Even if deep down he wished for people to trust him, he didn't expect it to ever happen on a large scale, so it didn't matter.