Infatuated with a God

Chapter One-Hundred and Four

When I was captured by Hydra, Bucky would bring me books he managed to steal from missions. I grew up reading the same thing over and over until he could eventually swap it out and destroy the other one. I'd become lost in their worlds, their words becoming a gateway to another universe. One where there was no torture, no suffering for me. In them, many focussed on this idea of an idyllic royal world. One where you could go through life, fall in love, and have a lot of leisure time. I knew that wasn't going to be the experience, even if it did feel like I was in some historical romance on occasion. Still, it didn't prepare me for the pressure and weight of responsibility I took on. Nothing could have prepared me for it. That introduction alone introduced me to a room of people who would do nothing but scrutinise me. Granted, they did so anyway, but now it meant something. Similarly to the press on Earth, any wrong move or judgement call reflected not just on myself, but Loki and his family. Whilst I knew this before taking it, hearing the wave of negative thoughts rush throughout the hall when I was granted residency solidified how much was stacked against me. For being Midgardian, for being young, and for being Loki's. It was rare for someone to be brought into a formal position within the court, most of the families that held any sort of position dated back to the formation of Asgard. Whilst a few of the families in the court were Vanir, the majority were Asgardian. It was quite the stir for a Midgardian to join, yet alone take up a position.

Most people used their title to shield them from any responsibilities. The Lords and Ladies here owned land and ran it but did little else. Many stayed at their homes, but often took advantage of the luxuries of the palace. A few influential families had varied responsibilities but still they did little in terms of running it. That solely fell on the Allfather and his sons. Thor running the military and Loki taking the politics side. For a Midgardian to begin to take up a place so high up in the court, well it turned heads. I moved from person to person for hours, noting the friendly smiles each one used to hide how displeased they were. There were some who didn't care, a few minor families who embraced a welcomed change. But the ones that hated it were loud, some even openly detesting it as if we couldn't hear. One particular conversation in the corner of the room caught my ear, mostly because it had caught Loki's, who was becoming increasingly agitated. Not that those around us could tell, but the small glances off to the side, the increased tightness of his jaw, it all gave it away. I excused myself when one of them referred to me as a harlot, touching Loki's arm in time before he did something that would make it far worse.

"I'm exhausted from travelling, do you think we could retire for the day?" I spoke loud enough for people around us to hear, giving him an out without him having to do so himself. They already considered me weaker, might as well use it to my advantage.

A green mist surrounded us as we were soon teleported away. I assumed by the black features of the room that it was Loki's living room. Nothing we could ever have done in the compound could have ever done this space justice. The marble fireplace alone was probably more expensive than anything I'd ever laid my eyes on, and the art around the space was overwhelmingly beautiful. His arms came around my waist as he pulled me closer to him, pressing a small kiss on the back of my head. He held me so tight, as if I were going to disappear at any given moment.

"You're scared." I spoke softly, worried he would be on edge at the conversation we were about to have. But ever since Odin introduced me to the court he had been on edge, as his father stated he wanted me to do this and also feared it.

"I suppose I am." I turned in his arms, bringing mine over his shoulders and pressing my lips in a kiss on his chest.

"Talk to me." He sighed as he held me against him. I gave him the time to gather his thoughts, moving my arms off of his shoulders and around his body, keeping him against me. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the way he felt against me, how I felt his seiðr reacting to mine. Eventually he found the way to voice his worries.