• • • Indian Arranged Marriage • • •
~ You're the peace I crave in this chaotic world. ~
He was three, when he held her little finger for the first time. He didn't know, what future held for them. But he did know that he wanted to hold onto this lit...
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When you live with a huge, loving and caring family... your life starts revolving around them. Especially for the youngest and most loved kid.
I'm the youngest kid. Being born the last among all the four kids, I was everyone's little baby. Because I was a little baby. A premature one. Suhana was 2 and half kgs when she was born. I on the other hand, was just 1.2 kg. They had to put me in the incubator for days before I was allowed to take home.
And that wasn't the end of that, the problem with my eating disorder and weak health made everyone very careful of me. If I'd cry for 10 minutes, I had to spend the next day in bed. I had and still have headaches so bad... I'd start crying. This was messed up cycle... I'd cry for something and then I had really bad headache and then I'll cry because of the pain and then I used to suffer more. Seeing doctors was a regular day. My parents did everything... from trying to make me eat anything that I could like to taking us all to park where maybe I'd start opening up.
Nothing ever worked. I was always scared around new faces. My life revolved around my brother, my best friend and him. And they understood it and did everything to make me comfortable.
But it made me a whiny child. I always wanted their attention, and if they even talked to some other kid around my age, I was jealous. Especially him. At the mere age of four, I had made him my everything. Suhana was my best friend, Advik my brother but he... he was my everything. And I hated sharing his attention, I was okay when he was around our family but if he talked to or played with new faces, it was horrible for me.
My eating disorder was a messed-up stage for me. I could eat, but I couldn't keep the food down. I would start throwing up. And that used to make me cry, and he used to be there for me. Actually, I only allowed him to be there. My parents took me to the doctor, psychologist, pediatricians... everywhere. I started having food but the fear of getting sick scared me. A doctor suggested Mumma to take me on walk as soon as I finished eating because he said that may help with my mood and work as a distraction. He took me to those walks.
It helped. I started eating well but I also got habitual of walking. Slowly that turned into runs. With him by my side.
But by this time, I was extremely possessive about him. I had just turned 12 when I got to know that we'll get married. Him and me. I didn't understand what love was and what exactly marriage was. We had come home from school one day and went to our houses when suddenly he started shouting loudly. We ran to check on him. His grandfather was trying to shush him down, but he wouldn't stop shouting, 'Main Ahaana se shaadi karunga.'
That day he had to sit down with all the elders for hours. He just told me that when we both grow up and complete our studies and get jobs, we'll get married. And I said, 'okay'.
Later when I grew up, I understood that those hours that he spent with our parents was where he had been threatened to follow some strict rules. He wasn't allowed to say the three words to me till I complete my high school. Neither could he spend alone time with me and kisses and touching inappropriately. Because he was 15. Had started his teenage years and his science books had reproduction chapter and my parents were scared to their wits.
