Random Experiences - 2022

Dear Titi, ... - 23.02.22

Be gentle with yourself while you go through the motions. It may take a while...

Honestly, from experience, going through these motions can be unpredictable...

The tiredness, the loss of interest in things, the different emotions that may show up

(numbness, anger, pain about the time spent, the thought of how things might have been different if one had taken a decision earlier, the lonely feeling of not having people who might fully understand your decision, sometimes the thought of life ahead of one and the future, sadness, loneliness, even missing the work you left gan... memories coming to you of the good, bad, beautiful, and ugly times)

Sometimes, one's cool with being around people, sometimes one gets irritable...

These were some of my personal experiences...

Going through the motions can be like a roller coaster...

As much as possible, be gentle with yourself while you go through the motions of change...

It's a phase that's not time-dependent. However you feel about it is okay dear, even when it seems not okay. 🌚

Yeah... 😏😏 And your world might sometimes seem like it has taken a pause or it's in slow-mo. Like everybody's driving on and you're crawling behind despite the serious efforts you put in.

At least, that was how it was for me. It sometimes still feels like that.

I remember how I'll see pictures of guys in the corporate world and the feeling would hit fresh of how that might have been me but see me on my bed in my nightwear at 3 in the afternoon.

And I'll get sad about it, and pressures will come financially and there's no end-of-month salary to bank on, and the grind isn't yet paying as expected, and all the "what ifs" begin to roll in...

It can get really overwhelming... And weakens one's spirit...

Babes... For real, I feel you and the struggle of this phase. I know words may not be able to bear or express all that you might be experiencing at this period of your life...

You're tired. That's what this is.

Especially how decisions like this are not made overnight. One might have struggled over coming to terms with them for weeks, months, or even years gan...

It just so happens that one reached the point where one got really exhausted and taking a break was just what one needed to do (using one because it may not be the case for you. I'm speaking from personal experiences).

Honestly, dear, it's okay to feel however you feel right now. There's no manual to this phase. I wish there was but we all have unique experiences and circumstances in life. I may not be able to say do this or that to feel better.

Your experiences might be different from mine and they are valid and real.

Sometimes you'll feel like laying in bed for longer hours, or having your eating schedule scattered, sometimes losing appetite, sometimes eating voraciously, you'll feel like you're lacking in your usual beauty or hygiene routine, simple chores can become overly tiresome for you,

And there's the loneliness to deal with if you're like me who went into hibernation. Having that switch from seeing tons of people every day to seeing just yourself and maybe family or a few friends or nobody sometimes, it can be pretty hard to deal with...

and there's always social media to show you how life could be sweeter but you are just there...

Baby girl, you're TIRED.

It's time to rest and breathe. If taking your bath in the morning seems like a chore, ngwanu, let it be a chore... (this is me projecting o... 🤣😂 I'd sometimes stay 2days before having my bath. Na me kuku dey my house. I no get visitor).

Have all the rest you deserve at this phase of life.

I know you to be very industrious and ambitious. so it's not like you're lazy (which you can sometimes beat yourself up about). no. you're just tired, and tired people need rest.

You've deprived yourself of so much to meet some other needs and now your inner self just wants its own time to feel pampered back to life. It's the soul's way of saying give me attention too.

so take your time to recover and find yourself again dear. No matter how long it takes. You go reach where you plan to reach las las. #BOB

If hugs could get you there, I for don organize hug party for you... 😅😅 still collect hugs all the same...

🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗