Finding Me (Sequel to Ava,The World, and Niall Horan)

14: No One Except Us

I stared at him for a while longer. Niall looked strangely calm and I held my breath in. I waited a while longer, but nothing happened. His facial expressions didn’t change because he didn’t have one.

I stopped breathing and when I looked at his eyes staring at our tangled fingers, I almost died.

It was a while longer until I saw a small smile creep onto his lips. He still didn’t look up at me. Niall kept his gaze on our fingers but I was okay with it all.

His smile wasn’t a broad grin, but rather just another smile. Completely ordinary, but also completely true, nothing close to hiding any pain, just embracing joy with tight arms.

“Ava I…” Niall started but trailed off quickly. His smile fell from his face and I swear I almost died again. He looked a bit sad which not only made me sad but also quickly depressed.

“I just told you I never stopped loving you,” I muttered at him, “but this is starting to sound an awful lot like when you broke up with me the first time.”

“That’s not what I ment,” he said with the same straight face, “I just mean that I want to keep your best interested in check.”

I didn’t understand what he was saying but it sounded an awful lot like ‘no.’

“My best interest?” I questioned. I wasn’t mad, just confused. Maybe I had misread everything.

“Yeah…” I heard him say slowly, “I don’t want you to get hated and called horrible names for it all again. Just being linked to each other made everyone call you a homewrecker, I couldn’t stand that happening again.”

“Niall, I don’t care about that. I have thick skin, I think I can handle a little name calling. I handled it for two years straight remember?” I smiled. Even when he’s supposed to be breaking my heart he makes me smile.

“Still, I can spear from a small portion only, I will.”

“What’s the point in protecting me from a little name calling, if I’m going to be miserable anyway? When they said all those things I didn’t care, I had you in the end anyway!”

I took in a big breath and stared at Niall confused again. Our fingers had untangled at the air made my hand feel cold.

 “The hate never stops Niall, I wish it would, for everyone, but it doesn’t,” I reminded, “Even if were not together it’s going to keep going, and it won’t always be directioners. It’s going to be random types of people; Directioners are only one group of many. I can handle the hate from one group and I hate the rest anyway so it’s okay!” I said trying to lighten the mood, but it stayed in its own hard mood.

Niall stayed quiet again and I breathed in and out trying to keep calm. It was too hard though.

“Niall talk to me!” I begged.

He didn’t though. He didn’t soften up to me again, instead he hardened up again.

“Fine,” I muttered. I got up from my bed and headed for my door.

Humiliated doesn’t begin to explain how I felt!

“If we’re going to make this work we’re going to have to be careful,” I heard him say behind me. He barely started to process everything.

“About what?” I asked, “How exactly can you be careful about something like this?”

“It’s difficult,” I heard Niall say, “I’m walking on eggshells with management since the ‘Amy’ incident, and if I rush into another relationship only a couple weeks since the break-up, it wouldn’t end pretty.”

“Running the risk of being a man whore?” I asked.

“Yeah…” he said, “And you said in your interview yesterday that you and I were just friends, and then you have Mauro, it wouldn’t go over well.”

I just started to finally realize everything that could blow up in my face. But it was worth it right? I would be happy.

“So we’re just friends for now?” I questioned. I looked up at him. I was going to be miserable. It’s one thing to wonder and be miserable, but it’s another to know and still be miserable.

“We have to keep it a secret…” Niall said, “Not even the boys can know, not Simon, Minka, Eleanor, not even Allison; No one except us.”

 I liked the sound of that. Just us. Nothing else could interrupt it was just us two and no one else.

I could find the strength to speak so I settled with nodding.

He smiled at me and I smiled back while staring at his blue eyes. They were way cleared that mine now, but they were still the home of the tight arms that held me at night.

I laid in his arms and smiled to myself. I had missed this feeling. And it wasn’t like the feelings I felt when he would hug me or kiss me randomly during that confusing week. I was confused that week, about everything, but this time I’m not. I know exactly what’s going on and I know exactly how I’m going to handle everything

                         *** *2 weeks later*

“Yeah, I’m about to go on,” I said to Niall through the phone. I was on the set of my very last interview for this month. After today I go back home and get to sleep in an actual bed! Most importantly I can see Niall again and we can hang out in his apartment while the boys are with their girls. After that I’ll pretend to hand with Mauro and Harry while Niall goes to hang out with his friends and take pictures for twitter so that we’re not linked at all. We had this planned to crisp perfection.

“Alright,” I said with a smile, “I love you too. I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t forget to bring the football!” I reminded.

I smiled and hung up. I had to wait until I was brought onto the set to actually do anything. I noticed some of the workers were eavesdropping on what they could about my conversation just now. They heard everything but nothing pointed obviously to Niall. Actually it leads a bit to Mauro. I’ll see Mauro tomorrow and the press will catch it, they’ll show Niall with friends from twitter photos and the boys agreed to a football match when I’ll bring Mauro along.

It was perfect. He was perfect. Niall though, not Mauro.

“Ava we’re ready for you.” They said sneaking into my dressing room. I looked at her and stood up to follow her out.

“Remember what Simon told you,” I reminded myself mentally, “Be nice, likable, and talk about the album a lot. If they talk about Mauro act cheesy and change the topic quickly with a devilish grin. Be likable! But most important of all, absolutely no NIALL AND AMY TALK!”

I took a breath and sighed. Time to get this show on the road. I heard my name and walked out with a smile. The sooner today ends, the sooner I can go back to my boyfriend.

A/N: Heres the chapter, Hope you guys enjoy it, don't forget to COMMENT, VOTE, AND FAN! Rememeber that you should read the first book before this one, I got a message saying someone was so confused! Hahaha, anyway love ya'll and an UPDATE will be on Monday!

<3

Xx-Daniela