1. Memories, For, When I Am. (Being edited 2024)

Reality? (Questions)

the reality I see in front of me,
Is it real?
Can it be?
I cannot tell the difference you see
for I cannot accept what my eyes
convey to me.

I live in my own waking world,
The one children are aware of,
And
I see that its faking,
what could my mind possibly be making?
it's so pain staking!
If I touch something is it real?
Is it there?

Though I may live in my own slice of reality,
I can feel that my morality is slowly
drifting and dwindlingnlike the stars in the
night sky.

When I die will it end?
Is it worth which I seek to defend?
For in darkness you cannot see which you cannot sew.

In the end will it all turn to ash?
Just like how a flame rose from her own
long ago?

I don't beg to differ,
as I sit in a corner and quiver with fear
and regret.

What have I done?
Where have I gone wrong?
I stare, confused.
Do I really have that much to lose?
and
any is it when you find the truth,
you just don't know what to do,
anymore.

Am I alive?
Am I real?
I just don't know if I really can feel,
with what reality has given me.

I just cannot grasp what is my true meaning,
what is is my task?

When I love others, do others love me?
When I am angered, does my aggressor shrink down
in fear?
When I eat or do any other thing, is it really even there?

Reality is something I simply live in, but
is not quite simple to comprehend.
So I lie in wait and pretend as I slip the surely bonds of sanity
and slowly grow deeper and darker until reality is nothing
but a fragment in my once innocent waking mind.
And if this is a dream, please don't wake me.
Because
it's perfect, and I can't resist its awe and pleasant wonder any longer.

So now I seek to set myself free and rebreach the bonds of my world
where I, can feel safe once more.