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Mom: Billie Mama: Cassie

Eloise

"I feel like you're keeping something from me," Sage said to me.

"What makes you think that?"

"You've been throwing up, is it because of what I think it is?"

"What do you think it is?"

"Are you pregnant?"

"That's just the thing I don't know...I wasn't going to tell you until I was sure"

"Well you should've told me anyways like how could you hide something like that from me?"

"Because I don't even know for sure, I can't just tell you I'm pregnant when it could be a false alarm"

"Still that's something I should prepare for"

"Then what you'll leave me?"

"What?"

"You're not going to leave me...are you?"

"Eloise no, I could never do that I just need you to be honest with me"

"God Sage this is hard on me too, if it's positive I have no idea how to raise a kid, I'm scared Sage"

"Yeah I'm fucking scared too"

"Sage"

"What?" She snapped at me and I was immediately taken back, I wanted to shed tears right then and there, I instead of showing sadness I resulted in anger.

"You know it took the both of us to make a baby so don't you fucking get mad at me," I raised my voice at her and pushed her.

"Don't start that shit yes I'm fucking aware," She yelled back.

"Then own up to the fucking consequences at the end of the day I'm the one that'll be carrying not you"

"Fuck I can't do this with you right now"

"So you're going to walk away?"

"I'm going outside to go smoke you stay here and just fucking relax"

"Fine whatever"

Sage

I stepped outside and sat onto the porch and fiend through my pockets with sweaty palms and sweat dripping down my forehead, I was desperate trying to find my pills.

"Fuck," I huffed in disappointment when I found a bag in my pocket with no pills, I didn't feel like I needed them until I fucking did and didn't take them with me. I bawled up the little bag in my hand and put my head down trying to get myself to relax.

"Addiction isn't easy is it?" I heard Billie say. I look over to find her standing on the porch right next to the door.

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"I think you do"

"I take pills okay? Fuck"

"She finally told you?"

"I kinda just figured it out but yeah"

"You know it starts with pills until you can't feel it anymore"

"Billie please I can't do this right now"

"I care about you kid, the last thing I wanna hear about is you in the hospital or dead for taking one too many pills"

"Billie I'm scared, it's going to be hard raising a kid, I can barely handle myself, I lied to Eloise and told her I don't really like doing pills because I thought I was capable of getting clean or just sticking to weed, but I'm not"

"You need it not to feel sick it's hard, it's also hard to raise a kid, so you gotta make a choice, it's Eloise or the drugs, kid or no kid you still have to make that decision, if you choose drugs I suggest you leave my daughter, it's your choice"

"But what if she's pregnant?"

"Then I suggest you get clean, for Eloise and for your kid, the kid can't grow up without you"

________

Eloise

"Hey Sage can we talk?" I knocked on the door to her bedroom.

But no answer. I turned the door knob and went inside of her bedroom.

She was laying down on her bed and was fast asleep, I took off my shoes and laid down next to her joining her in bed.

"Hey," She said groggily turning over to cuddle me and kiss me on the head.

"I have news"

"What is it?"

"A stomach flu, I'm not pregnant Sage"

"Oh shit"

"That's good right?"

"Yeah that's good"

She looked down at me and I leaned into her giving her a kiss on the lips. We pulled away shortly after and I laid my head on her chest and closed my eyes.

"I love you Sage," I kissed her neck.

"I love you more"
________

I couldn't sleep and I was hungry as fuck, I was craving a vegan grilled cheese but too comfortable in my bed to get up and go make one, but my stomach rumbled so I finally decided to get up and go make some.

Mom went grocery shopping and got all our favorite snacks so bitch best believe Imma eat good. I grabbed a smaller blanket and wrapped it around me before walking out of my room, I walked pass my brother's bedroom and saw that his lights were on so I decided to ask him if he wanted something to eat.

I opened his door and he quickly inhaled smoke hiding whatever he was smoking under his pillow, at this point I wasn't even surprised I guess addiction runs in the family.

"Look I'm not here to give you shit I just wanted to ask if you wanted a grilled cheese?"

"Yeah"

"Come"

"Hey Eloise?"

"What?"

"Don't tell mom"

"Fine just help me with the food"
_______

"As your big sister i don't mind if you smoke but only if you're smoking responsibly," I told Jayden.

"Thanks"

So why did you start smoking anyway?"

"..at first I wanted to look cool in front of my new friends but my anxiety started coming back and I was shaky and fidgety and I started chewing things without realizing it, smoking was the only thing that stopped it from happening"

"I know how you feel but what's making you so anxious?"

"I don't know everything, school, moms, Stephanie"

"Well if you ever feel like that come to me, I'm your big sister I'm always here to help you"

"Thanks," he smiled.

"I gotchu," I kissed his head.