Never Let Go

Chapter 68: Hope

I hate hospitals.

I've been in and out of them so many times that it feels like a second home, and that's not a good thing. And why do they always have that weird smell? Like, death and disinfectant.

The waiting room is deadly silent, if you pardon the pun. Everyone looks so miserable, and like they're waiting for their turn to die. I mean, they're not exactly going to be sat here laughing with beaming smiles on their faces, are they? It's super depressing because we've all got the same life threatening disease, but in different forms, and none of us know if we're going to survive. The people around me could literally be dead in the next few weeks, months or years. One of those people could be me.

I'm terrified and incredibly anxious. I just want to get up and run away. Michael looks at me with a soft smile and reassuringly rests his hand on my restless leg. I haven't stopped jogging it since we sat down. If he wasn't here, I'd definitely be up and out of here by now. Although, I'm beginning to lose my patience because it feels like we've been sat here for hours. It feels like a long time, but It's probably only been 5 minutes. I just want this to be over with.

"When are they gonna call my name?" I said frustratedly as I pick at the skin around my nails nervously.

"The receptionist said it'll be about a 10 or 15 minute wait. It's ok, I'm sure they'll call you soon." He said softly as he reaches for my hand.

He stops me from picking at the skin and interlocks his fingers with mine. I sigh heavily and run my hand through my hair.

"We've been waiting for ages." I shake my head, becoming more agitated and impatient.

"Maya, it's alright, just take a deep breath. I know you're nervous, but it won't be much longer now. Do you want me to get you some water?"

"No, I just want this appointment to be over with." I said as I start to raise my voice. "What's taking them so long?"

"They have other patients-"

I bolt out of my chair and head over to the reception desk.

"Excuse me?" I said to the old lady behind the desk. "Can you tell the doctor to hurry up? We've been waiting a long time."

"I'm sorry, but the doctors and nurses are very busy today and they're running over time slightly-"

"I don't care! That's not good enough!" I scoff. "Making cancer patients wait like this is disgusting!"

"Maya." Michael said sternly as he stands by my side.

"I'm sorry." The old lady said apologetically with a pathetic frown on her face. "I understand your frustration, but-"

"Sorry isn't good enough! You think saying sorry is going to help the disease in my body?"

"No." She quickly shakes her head looking slightly scared. "I'll call the doctor and see if she is free now."

"Good idea." I roll my eyes.

"Thank you." Michael nods and holds my arm, taking me back over to the chairs.

Everyone looks at me after the scene I've just caused and I give them all a glare. I don't know what their fucking problem is? I'm not the bad guy here, I'm one of them!

"Maya, you need to calm down. You're not the only patient the doctors are trying to help. They're trying their best." Michael said, keeping his voice low.

"Calm down?" I laugh and shake my head. "You're not the one who's about to be told how much time you have left to live."

"I know." He takes a deep breath and pauses for a second. "I'm sorry, I know this is hard for you, but shouting and taking your anger out on the receptionist isn't going to get you seen by the doctor any quicker. Just try to take deep breaths. It'll be ok."