The One After [SHAWN MENDES]

Chapter 90

Late one night during the week following my birthday, I woke up with a start from a nightmare. As I tried to catch my breath, my eyes adjusted to the dark, and the unfamiliar setting scared me.

"What's wrong?" Shawn mumbled, as he sat up. That's when I realized I was in his condo instead of my apartment.

"Bad dream."

He wrapped an arm around me and pulled me towards him. "What was it about."

"I don't know. Wait... maybe I do...it's like it's there but foggy." I closed my eyes and after a few seconds it came to me. "D-drowning," I stuttered. "I was underwater and I was drowning. I could feel my lungs fill up as everything turned black."

"Fuck!" he hit his hand on the mattress in frustration. "I knew I shouldn't have told your family about that night. I'm so sorry, baby."

I shook my head. "It's not your fault. I think it's because the trial is less than a week away. My therapist has been preparing me for how hard it might be for over a month."

"But still, there was no reason to have it mess you up before then. What can I do to help? You're shaking like crazy."

I hadn't even realized that I was trembling. Running a hand through my hair, I found that I'd broken out in a cold sweat. "I know I won't sleep anymore tonight, but there's no reason for you not to. I'll go to the living room and read."

"If you're staying up, then so am I. We could watch a movie. Wasn't there a Netflix series you wanted to see?"

"I don't think I could focus. I'm gonna go pee and get a drink," I told him as I threw off the covers.

I went to the kitchen first and got myself a large glass of water which I downed before filling it and drinking half of the second. Then I went to the hall bath and sat down on the toilet, resting my elbows on my knees as I tried to calm my erratically beating heart. "It was just a nightmare. You weren't actually remembering that night," I told myself.

But what if I was? If I was able to remember it all, I could testify against Liam and the case would be open and shut. Closing my eyes, I pictured the water and tried to recall what had happened right before I fell in during the nightmare, but it was gone now. Only the worst part where I slowly died remained.

When I went back to Shawn's bedroom, I found him on his phone, but he tossed it aside and opened his arms when he saw me. "C'mere honey."

I climbed onto his lap and let him try to comfort me, but it was no use. I wasn't frightened at all; I felt lost. It was like I was wandering around looking for something that was hidden in shadows, and I knew the answer had to be somewhere.

"Shawn," I said as a thought occurred to me, "can you take me to the pier?"

"Yeah of course. We can go tomorrow morning," he said a bit dismissively. I didn't blame him since he wasn't in my head and didn't understand how urgent this matter felt.

"No! I need to go now while the nightmare is fresh. I think if I'm there where it all happened, I might be able to remember it."

"Remember the nightmare or the actual incident?"

"I'm not sure, but this is the first time I've felt like I might be able to recall it. You know that feeling when a word is on the tip of your tongue? That's what I'm experiencing right now. It's just out of reach, but maybe if I'm where it all went down, I'll grasp it."

He was quiet for a sec and then he let out a deep exhale. "Let's get dressed and we'll go there. If it helps, then that's great. If it doesn't, then we can stop at some twenty-four hour diner on the way home and pig out on something unhealthy."