The One After [SHAWN MENDES]

Chapter 140

Shawn fell onto the couch in a state of exhaustion. "We're done, right?"

It killed me to answer him truthfully, "Not yet. My apartment still has to be cleaned."

The movers had just left. They'd come here first to get my inferior mattress, and then they went to my place and loaded the truck with every piece of furniture I owned. The team of two burly guys took the things I wasn't merging with Shawn's to a storage unit I rented and brought the rest to the condo. It was a long process, and even if we weren't doing the heavy lifting, we had to oversee all of it and place things as they were brought in.

We'd rearranged some furniture in his living room while the moving crew reassembled Shawn's bed frame, and in the end we were very satisfied with the result. It no longer felt like his condo now that several of my things were integrated into the mix. The pretty pillows and throw blanket I added to the white sectional sofa warmed the room up substantially, and my bookcase added some personality.

We'd bought a beautiful Turkish rug to replace the white fluffy one he had under the coffee table, because Inky kept pulling out tufts of the faux fur. It was a practical decision, but I secretly loved that the replacement added more color. I had some framed prints which we hung on the walls along with a shelf my dad made me out of repurposed wood for my birthday one year.

"We have to clean it today?" he asked wearily.

"I told the apartment manager that I was turning in the key by five. She's been so accommodating about letting me break my lease early that I need to keep my word. If you want to stay here, I can do it on my own. It won't take more than two hours."

He hoisted himself up. "I'm not letting you do that alone. Do we need to bring anything over like toilet bowl cleaner?"

"I left all my supplies there."

We divided the labor once we got to my apartment. I worked on the kitchen and bathroom, while he spackled the nail holes, touched up the paint, dusted all the baseboards, and ran the vacuum. I was good about housework, so it didn't take long to get the job done, and I was confident that it was cleaner than when I moved in, which meant I'd get my security deposit back. Money wasn't a huge issue for me these days, but I liked having my nest egg.

"Is it hard to say goodbye?" Shawn asked, draping an arm around my shoulders as we admired the empty living area.

"It was a really big achievement for me to afford a place of my own. I love your condo, and it's definitely a major upgrade, but it's bittersweet to end this chapter in my life."

"Our condo," he reminded me for the hundredth time. Sometimes I got it right, but more often than not I forgot that it was mine, too. "We need to celebrate that the move is complete. Can I take you out on a fancy date?"

I looked up at him and smiled. "That's a very tempting offer, but after our weekend in New York and the craziness of today, I'd prefer to go home, take a long hot shower, and get something delivered." We didn't have much food in the fridge or cupboards, so cooking was out of the question.

"That sounds really good to me, too."

We arrived at the condo and found Inky sprawled across the dining room table. She never did this at my old place, probably because it was my workspace so she didn't have the opportunity. I shooed her off. "Sorry," I told Shawn. "Hopefully we can break this habit."

He laughed. "Like I care? I'm glad she's made herself at home. I think she likes that spot since it has a good view of the patio and the birds that fly up to use my feeder. What if we move her perch so that it has the same view?"

"Smart thinking."

He got the large cat structure from our bedroom and placed it in the dining room. Inky walked over and hopped up before leaping to the table where she made herself comfortable again.

"Naughty girl," I told her as I picked her up and placed her on the floor. She shot me a look and ran down the hall to our bedroom.

Shawn went to the fridge and pulled out a three-quarters full bottle of my favorite Sauvignon Blanc. "Let's have a glass of wine before our shower so that we can loosen up a bit."

"That sounds good," I remarked as I took a seat at the kitchen island. "Is it okay if we don't take a sexy shower? I'm too tired and still sore from the weekend."

"It's always okay to not fool around. Are you sore from the ten miles we walked yesterday or...?" He poured us each a generous glass and handed me mine.

"Both. But it's a good sore in each case. I definitely need to be more active. Wanna go jogging tomorrow morning?"

"You know I'm up for that. We could go back to the spot we had our first run together," Shawn suggested.

"That was a really good day. We shared that we had feelings for each other." My cheeks flushed as I remembered how exciting that had been.

"I remember it well, Lulu. I was scared out of my fucking mind to tell you that I liked you and that I was ready to let you in. You weren't exactly giving me the usual signs I get when someone is into me."

"Meaning I wasn't overly flirty?" I asked.

"Exactly. Most women make it really obvious that they're either open to hooking up or that they want to start something. You weren't cold by any means, but at times it felt like you were holding back."

I took a long sip of my crisp white wine. "I was in a strange place mentally. The dream was still so vivid in my mind, and I had to fight confusing that world with reality. I was terrified of being overly-familiar with you since it felt like I knew you so much better than I did. I'm sorry if I ever came across as aloof."

He looked at me thoughtfully, and I was momentarily worried he was annoyed that I brought the topic up. "When you first told me about the dream, all I could focus on was that you kept it from me and that it meant you might not love me for me. I lost sight of how horrible and confusing that time must have been for you. I'm sorry I didn't have more empathy."

"I thought we were done apologizing for all that."

"Sorry. I just needed to tell you that I recognize how I didn't handle it well."

I hopped off the stool and joined him on the other side of the counter, wrapping my arms around his waist. "I really appreciate you saying that. It was a rough time, but given how things are now, I'm okay with the past pain. I'm stronger now because of it, and we're stronger as a couple."

We finished our wine and took a hot shower together. Shawn washed my hair, and I melted as his long fingers massaged my scalp. I returned the favor, but we opted to wash our own bodies lest one of us became too aroused from the touching. I changed into cozy pajamas and he put on sweats and a henley. Curling up together on the couch, he opened his phone so we could look at the various dinner choices.

"Pizza is always good," he said.

"Agreed, but we'll probably have it tomorrow at my dad's."

We were spending the first half of Halloween night with my father and Jennifer, and then we were heading to Pickering to celebrate with his parents. Before meeting up with our families, we planned to carve the pumpkins we'd picked out at a roadside stand the week before. Prior to the NY trip, we put up a few fall decorations that his mom bought him years ago, and I was happy that I was fully embracing the holiday again. I even had a costume that I was excited about.

"Thai? Mexican? Indian?" he asked.

"Indian sounds really good. Maybe saag paneer and some dal? I want garlic naan with mine." Ethnic foods often had the best options to fit his dietary restrictions, and I loved the bold flavors of south Asian cuisine.

"I'll place the order. Why don't you get us another glass of wine and turn on some music."

Our night was lovely, and even though I hadn't been up for sex, I had enough gas left in my tank to lounge on the sofa kissing my boyfriend until we were both drowsy. Then we crawled into our shared bed and slept soundly in each other's arms.