Bucky. That's all Steve wanted and needed in his life. Before the war, during, and even after, all Steve wanted was his solider. His Bucky.
After the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Steve kept trying to find Bucky to bring him home. Everyone was against this...
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I don't know how long I have been sitting on this bathroom floor holding Bucky. But suddenly I am brought out of my thoughts when Bucky starts moving in my arms slowly waking up.
"S-st-steve" Bucky chokes out. Before I can reply he presses his head further into my neck and curls into me crying.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He keep repeating.
I continue rocking him back and forth slowly calming him down.
"It's okay. I'm here baby. I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner to stop you. I am never letting you go baby, but I need you to start talking to me more Bucky. Please" I whisper to him.
He just nods his head and I softly press a kiss again the crown of his head.
"I love you Bucky. So much and I cannot lose you" I whisper.
"I love you Steve. I'm so sorry I almost left you" he whimpers out cuddling closer.
Sam knocks on the door before I respond and comes in. "He doing okay now?" Sam asked.
"Yeah I think so. It may take some time for him to get back to himself like he was beginning to. But I think he will be okay. He has me and you to help him out with everything." I say.
That evening, Bucky and I sat down and talked everything out that has been going through his mind. He told me it was nothing I did, it was just all in his head. He said the flashbacks of everything where getting to him.
So at the end of the night, he promised to be more open about the dreams and flashbacks so we could handle it together instead of him being alone.
Time skip 3 months Over the last 3 months things seem to be going pretty great for Bucky and I since his harming insident.
He's done really well at keeping his promise and opening up about his nightmares and flashbacks, and doesn't fight regressing anymore.
For a while he struggled not fighting it because of the trauma he faces as a little in hydra.
Overall our marriage and caregiver/little dynamic has worked fantastic for us. We are closer than ever before. I hate that it took him harming himself for those conversations to happen, but since they have I couldn't ask for a closer relationship.
I can never keep my hands off him. I'm constantly holding him, kissing him, hugging him, playing with his hair to make him relax, and simply loving on him. I make sure to always kiss the cuts on his wrists, shoulder, and thighs. I remind him of how beautiful he is and how much I love and adore him.
We've discovered outside of his headspace, we still fall into a dom/sub style relationship and it works for us. There are times Bucky is in control because he needs to be but most of the time it is me.
I adore and love taking care of him, while he loves me protecting and taking care of me. We ended up getting into a little argument one time over this because he felt he wasn't doing anything in the marriage.
