beyond the grid - max verstappen

chapter eighteen

the Miami weather was the only thing keeping me warm, not even the thick Mercedes hoodie lewis forced on me on saturday was helping. when I turned up to get lunch with him, he noticed the goose bumps on my warms and the way my body slightly shook and insisted on not letting me leave without a hoodie. lando didn't say a word about it when I returned to the mclaren garage still not wanting to speak to me. but we were going to be forced to speak today.

my hands traced over the inscription on my zippo lighter, my mind flicking to the first time I met ben. it was a work party, all of the executives had left, leaving the players and all the younger staff to continue drinking into the early morning. it had been four years since I quit smoking and he reintroduced me.

now here I was crouching down against the wall at the back of the hotel, I pulled a cigarette deck from the hoodie pocket. there was only two left, I placed one between my lips leaving the same lucky dart, I had been carrying from country to country throughout the season. I struggle to strike the lighter, flicking it and flicking it. wanting to scream and toss the lighter across the garden, I flick it one last time and it finally comes to life.

the harsh smoke filled my lungs distracting my mind from the stomach pains that had been begging for my attention all morning. I couldn't face going to breakfast with the team anymore, the sheer amount of food available made my mind and stomach dance with excitement and sick with dread at the same time. I only continued to get lunch with lewis to not draw attention to my 'lack' of appetite.

I guess sitting against this wall made time go quicker as I felt my fingers start to get hot. I take the last drag of my cigarette before putting it out on the ground. standing up was a lot more effort than sitting down that was for sure. my legs uneasy as I stood, using the wall for guidance.

once I entered the gym, I stripped my body of the warm hoodie, heading away from my usual spot in front of the mirror. it was hard to see my reflection, it wasn't me staring back anymore and I couldn't deal with that uncomfortable feeling today. my body set in autopilot I set myself on the ground, starting my warm up routine. my mind not clicking into gear until a warm hand ran up my spin. my body flinched at the contact.

"you've been doing a lot of sit ups" his dutch accent was thick. I didn't have to turn around to recognise who was speaking

"not often" I keep my hands on my feet, stretching out my legs

"so how did you get these bruises then?" he reached out touching my lower spine again. I tried to quickly pull myself away from his touch by standing up. my head instantly started to spin causing me to stumble as I tried to find my footing. his hand gasped my shoulders holding my body still. "we can give this week a miss."

"no, this is my last training session before saturday" I was quick on the defence

"do you think you're up to racing?" his eyes scanning my face looking for any sign of weakness

"you're just trying to get out of today" I laughed trying to ignite his competitive nature, drawing his attention away from me. before he even had the chance to respond the doors to the gym opened revealing lando, both fitness coaches and the dts crew. I flash them all a wide smile. it was show time.

after the crew hooked us all up with microphones and set the cameras up it was my time to talk the crew through the workout.

"just start by introducing yourself" the man behind the camera spoke

"my name is Rebecca acester and im lando's personal pr and manager" I couldn't help but smile at this. but that pride was shortly overridden by disgust at my recent attitude towards him. I turn back sending a warm smile his way, which he returned. "this training is probably going to be a little different to what the drivers are used to. similar to f1, marathons need a lot of mental strength and determination as you are running for such a long time it is easy to get bored or lose motivation. this determination and competitiveness might be what gets the boys through today. I have been running marathons for quite a few years now and this is my race week routine."